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If a man is right, he can't be too radical if he is wrong, he can't be too conservative.

Josh Billings

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Josh Billings
Age: 67 †
Born: 1818
Born: April 21
Died: 1885
Died: October 14
Humorist
Writer
Lanesboro
Massachusetts
Henry Wheeler Shaw
Right
Men
Radical
Conservative
Wrong

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There never yet was a mother who taught her child to be an infidel.
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Words are often seen hunting for an idea, but ideas are never seen hunting for words.
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Adam invented love at first sight, one of the greatest labor-saving machines the world ever saw.
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The man who gets bit twice by the same dog is better adapted for that kind of business than any other.
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About the most originality that any writer can hope to achieve honestly is to steal with good judgment.
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Music hath the charm to soothe a savage beast, but I'd try a revolver first.
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Laughter is the fireworks of the soul.
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There is a sort of charm in ugliness, if the person has some redeeming qualities and is only ugly enough.
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Pyrotechnically considered, [laughing] is the fire-works of the soul.
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A learned fool is one who has read everything and simply remembered it.
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I called my cat William because no shorter name fits the dignity of his character. Poor old man, he has fits now, so I call him Fitz-William.
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One of the best temporary cures for pride and affectation is seasickness a man who wants to vomit never puts on airs.
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If you would make yourself agreeable wherever you go, listen to the grievances of others but never relate your own.
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The dog that will follow everbody ain't worth a curse.
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To enjoy a good reputation, give publicly, and steal privately.
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I hold that a man has as much right to spell a word as it is pronounced as he has to pronounce it the way it ain't spelled.
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It is easy to assume a habit but when you try to cast it off, it will take skin and all.
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The best time for you to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust.
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Life is short, but it's long enough to ruin any man who wants to be ruined.
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It strains a man's philosophy the worst kind to laugh when he gets beat.
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