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When a young man begins to go down hill everything seems to be greased for the occasion.

Josh Billings

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Josh Billings
Age: 67 †
Born: 1818
Born: April 21
Died: 1885
Died: October 14
Humorist
Writer
Lanesboro
Massachusetts
Henry Wheeler Shaw
Occasions
Hills
Begins
Funny
Greased
Seems
Sarcasm
Young
Hill
Everything
Occasion
Men
Sarcastic

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Love looks through a telescope envy, through a microscope.
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The hardest thing any man can do is to fall down on the ice when it's slippery, and get up and praise the Lord.
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As a general thing, an individual who is neat in his person is neat in his morals.
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Perseverance is king.
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Experience is a grindstone and it is lucky for us, if we can get brightened by it, and not ground.
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Occasions are rare and those, who know how to seize upon them, are rarer.
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The best way to convince a fool that he is wrong is to let him have his own way.
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The more humble a man is before God the more he will be exalted the more humble he is before man, the more he will get rode roughshod.
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The man whose only pleasure in life is making money, weighs less on the moral scale than an angleworm.
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It ain't no disgrace for a man to fall, but to lie there and grunt is.
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Pedigrees seldom improve by age the grandson is too often a weak infringement on the grandsire's parent.
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Adversity has the same effect on a man that severe training has on the pugilist: it reduces him to his fighting weight.
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There's a great power in words, if you don't hitch too many of them together.
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When a man comes to me for advice, I find out the kind of advice he wants, and I give it to him.
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It strains a man's philosophy the worst kind to laugh when he gets beat.
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Self-made men are most always apt to be a little too proud of the job.
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It is a very delicate job to forgive a man, without lowering him in his own estimation, and yours too.
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I called my cat William because no shorter name fits the dignity of his character. Poor old man, he has fits now, so I call him Fitz-William.
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It is easy to assume a habit but when you try to cast it off, it will take skin and all.
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One legged chickens, I know, are the least apt to scratch a garden.
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