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A good reliable set of bowels is worth more to a man than any quantity of brains.

Josh Billings

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Josh Billings
Age: 67 †
Born: 1818
Born: April 21
Died: 1885
Died: October 14
Humorist
Writer
Lanesboro
Massachusetts
Henry Wheeler Shaw
Good
Men
Bowels
Reliable
Brains
Quantity
Intellectual
Worth
Brain

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I never knew a man troubled with melancholy, who had plenty to do, and did it.
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Rumor is like bees the more you fight them the more you don't get rid of them.
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A learned fool is one who has read everything and simply remembered it.
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Honesty is the rarest wealth anyone can possess.
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Hunting after happiness is like hunting after a lost sheep in the wilderness--when you find it, the chances are that it is a skeleton.
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If you would make yourself agreeable wherever you go, listen to the grievances of others but never relate your own.
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Menny think tha luv their husbands almost tew deth, when in fack, tha are only jealous ov them.
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The thinner the ice, the more anxious is everyone to see whether it will bear.
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Nature makes all the noblemen wealth, education, or pedigree never made one yet.
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[Science is] the literature of truth.
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People travel to learn most of them before they start should learn to travel.
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As a general thing, when a woman wears the pants in a family, she has a good right to them.
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Experience is a grindstone and it is lucky for us, if we can get brightened by it, and not ground.
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The highest philosophers, in explaining the mystery of this world, are obliged to call in the aid of another.
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There are people so addicted to exaggeration that they actually can't tell the truth without lying.
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Society is composed of slow Christians and wide-awake sinners.
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Adam invented love at first sight, one of the greatest labor-saving machines the world ever saw.
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When a man comes to me for advice, I find out the kind of advice he wants, and I give it to him.
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Prejudice assumes the garb of reason, but the cheat is too thin.
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Keep a cow, and then the milk won't have to be watered but once.
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