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Theory looks well on paper, but does not amount to anything without practice.

Josh Billings

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Josh Billings
Age: 67 †
Born: 1818
Born: April 21
Died: 1885
Died: October 14
Humorist
Writer
Lanesboro
Massachusetts
Henry Wheeler Shaw
Practice
Doe
Anything
Wells
Without
Well
Paper
Looks
Theory
Amount

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It strains a man's philosophy the worst kind to laugh when he gets beat.
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Plenty of folks are so contrary that if they should fall into the river, they would insist upon floating upstream.
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I do not know of a better cure for sorrow than to pity somebody else.
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Lying is like trying to hide in a fog: If you move about you're in danger of bumping your head against the truth, and as soon as the fog blows off, you are gone anyhow.
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A puppy plays with every pup he meets, but an old dog has few associates.
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Zoroaster said, when in doubt abstain but this does not always apply. At cards, when in doubt take the trick.
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In the whole history of the world there is but one thing that money cannot buy...to wit--the wag of a dog's tail.
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Honesty is the rarest wealth anyone can possess.
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Love looks through a telescope envy, through a microscope.
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The man who gets bit twice by the same dog is better adapted for that kind of business than any other.
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If you would make yourself agreeable wherever you go, listen to the grievances of others but never relate your own.
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There never yet was a mother who taught her child to be an infidel.
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Prejudice assumes the garb of reason, but the cheat is too thin.
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As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand.
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Take the humbug out of this world, and you haven't much left to do business with.
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As long as we are lucky we attribute it to our smartness our bad luck we give the gods credit for.
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Woman's influence is powerful, especially when she wants something.
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It ain't no disgrace for a man to fall, but to lie there and grunt is.
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It ain't often that a man's reputation outlasts his money.
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[Science is] the literature of truth.
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