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Music hath the charm to soothe a savage beast, but I'd try a revolver first.

Josh Billings

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Josh Billings
Age: 67 †
Born: 1818
Born: April 21
Died: 1885
Died: October 14
Humorist
Writer
Lanesboro
Massachusetts
Henry Wheeler Shaw
Beast
Humorous
Funny
Revolver
Soothe
Music
Savage
Firsts
Savages
First
Hath
Trying
Charm

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If a man is right, he can't be too radical if he is wrong, he can't be too conservative.
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Human happiness konsists in having what yu want, and wanting what yu have.
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It ain't no disgrace for a man to fall, but to lie there and grunt is.
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About the most originality that any writer can hope to achieve honestly is to steal with good judgment.
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One legged chickens, I know, are the least apt to scratch a garden.
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Pyrotechnically considered, [laughing] is the fire-works of the soul.
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The truly innocent are those who not only are guiltless themselves but who think others are.
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It AIN'T so much the things we don't know that get us into trouble. It's the things we know that just ain't so.
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I never knew a man troubled with melancholy, who had plenty to do, and did it.
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Seneca devoted much of his time to writing essays in praise of poverty, and in lending money at usurious rates.
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What the world wants iz [sic] good examples, not so mutch advice advice may be wrong, but examples prove themselves.
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the squeeky wheel gets the grease.
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There is gravity in wisdom, but no particular wisdom in gravity.
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Every man has his follies - and often they are the most interesting thing he has got.
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