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In the whole history of the world there is but one thing that money cannot buy...to wit--the wag of a dog's tail.
Josh Billings
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Josh Billings
Age: 67 †
Born: 1818
Born: April 21
Died: 1885
Died: October 14
Humorist
Writer
Lanesboro
Massachusetts
Henry Wheeler Shaw
Cannot
Whole
Wags
Thing
Tail
World
Tails
Wit
Dog
History
Money
More quotes by Josh Billings
Human happiness konsists in having what yu want, and wanting what yu have.
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Laughter is the fireworks of the soul.
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It is much easier to repent of sins that we have committed than to repent of those that we intend to commit.
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I do not know of a better cure for sorrow than to pity somebody else.
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Pride seems tew be quite equally distributed the man who owns the carriage and the man who drives it seem tew have it just alike.
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It ain't often that a man's reputation outlasts his money.
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I never question a success, any more than I do the right of a bulldog to lie in his own gateway.
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It is a statistical fact that the wicked work harder to reach hell than the righteous do to enter heaven
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the squeeky wheel gets the grease.
Josh Billings
It's not ignorance does so much damage it's knowin' so derned much that ain't so.
Josh Billings
Marrying a woman for her money is very much like setting a rat-trap, and baiting it with your own finger.
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Building air castles is a harmless business as long as you don't attempt to live in them.
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There are people so addicted to exaggeration that they actually can't tell the truth without lying.
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Plenty of folks are so contrary that if they should fall into the river, they would insist upon floating upstream.
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Rumor is a vagrant without a home, and lives upon what it can pick up.
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If a man is right, he can't be too radical if he is wrong, he can't be too conservative.
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I never knew a man troubled with melancholy, who had plenty to do, and did it.
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Advice is like castor oil — easy enough to give but dreadful hard to take.
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Pedigrees seldom improve by age the grandson is too often a weak infringement on the grandsire's parent.
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When good-natured people leave us we look forward with extra pleasure to their return.
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