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Old maids sweeten their tea with scandal.

Josh Billings

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Josh Billings
Age: 67 †
Born: 1818
Born: April 21
Died: 1885
Died: October 14
Humorist
Writer
Lanesboro
Massachusetts
Henry Wheeler Shaw
Sweeten
Maids
Scandal
Tea

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We are ap tu hate them, who wont take our advice, and despise them who do.
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Pedigrees seldom improve by age the grandson is too often a weak infringement on the grandsire's parent.
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One legged chickens, I know, are the least apt to scratch a garden.
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No one can disgrace us but ourselves.
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One of the best temporary cures for pride and affectation is seasickness a man who wants to vomit never puts on airs.
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Occasions are rare and those, who know how to seize upon them, are rarer.
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You cannot analyze a kiss any more than you can dissect the fragrance of flowers.
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Plenty of folks are so contrary that if they should fall into the river, they would insist upon floating upstream.
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A good place to visit, but a poor place to stay.
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A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.
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I don't never have any trouble in regulating my own conduct, but to keep other folks' straight is what bothers me.
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Fashion makes fools of some, sinners of others, and slaves of all.
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There is only one good substitute for the endearments of a sister, and that is the endearments of some other fellow's sister.
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Friendship is like earthenware, once broken, it can be mended love is like a mirror, once broken that ends it.
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