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Everybody is as unstable as water.
Joseph Heller
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Joseph Heller
Age: 76 †
Born: 1923
Born: May 1
Died: 1999
Died: December 10
Autobiographer
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Screenwriter
Writer
New York City
New York
Unstable
Everybody
Water
More quotes by Joseph Heller
Everything passes. (That's what makes it endurable.)
Joseph Heller
The enemy, retorted Yossarian with weighted precision, is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on, and that includes Colonel Cathcart. And don't you forget that, because the longer you remember it, the longer you might live.
Joseph Heller
The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on.
Joseph Heller
I had examined myself pretty thoroughly and discovered that I was unfit for military service.
Joseph Heller
For war there is always enough. It's peace that's expensive.
Joseph Heller
Death to all modifiers, he declared one day, and out of every letter that passed through his hands went every adverb and every adjective.
Joseph Heller
It made him proud that 29 months in the service had not blunted his genius for ineptitude.
Joseph Heller
Well then I'd certainly be a damned fool to feel any other way, wouldn't I?
Joseph Heller
Something did happen to me somewhere that robbed me of confidence and courage and left me with a fear of discovery and change and a positive dread of everything unknown that may occur.
Joseph Heller
In the long run, failure was the only thing that worked predictably. All else was accidental.
Joseph Heller
I'll tell you what justice is. Justice is a knee in the gut from the floor on the chin at night sneaky with a knife brought up down on the magazine of a battleship sandbagged underhanded in the dark without a word of warning
Joseph Heller
It's a wise person, I guess, who knows he's dumb, and an honest person who knows he's a liar. And it's a dumb person, I guess, whose convinced he's wise...-Bob Slocum
Joseph Heller
Nurse Duckett found Yossarian wonderful and was already trying to change him.
Joseph Heller
How much reverence can you have for a Supreme Being who finds it necessary to include such phenomena as phlegm and tooth decay in His divine system of Creation? What in the world was running through that warped, evil, scatological mind of His when He robbed old people of the power to control their bowel movements?
Joseph Heller
Hungry Joe collected lists of fatal diseases and arranged them in alphabetical order so that he could put his finger without delay on any one he wanted to worry about.
Joseph Heller
He was sick with lust and mesmerized with regret
Joseph Heller
There was no telling what people might find out once they felt free to ask whatever questions they wanted to.
Joseph Heller
¨ Oh, I´m not complaining. I know there´s a war on. I know a lot of people are going to have to suffer for us to win it. But why must I be one of them?¨
Joseph Heller
Destiny is a good thing to accept when it's going your way. When it isn't, don't call it destiny call it injustice, treachery, or simple bad luck.
Joseph Heller
A man's head is his castle.
Joseph Heller