Quote

If Richard Nixon was second-rate, what in the world is third-rate?

Joseph Heller

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Joseph Heller
Age: 76 †
Born: 1923
Born: May 1
Died: 1999
Died: December 10
Autobiographer
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Screenwriter
Writer
New York City
New York
Thirds
Rate
Second
World
Nixon
Richard
Third

More quotes by Joseph Heller

Image
I had examined myself pretty thoroughly and discovered that I was unfit for military service.
Joseph Heller
Image
Well, he died. You don't get any older than that.
Joseph Heller
Image
The enemy, retorted Yossarian with weighted precision, is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on, and that includes Colonel Cathcart. And don't you forget that, because the longer you remember it, the longer you might live.
Joseph Heller
Image
¨ Oh, I´m not complaining. I know there´s a war on. I know a lot of people are going to have to suffer for us to win it. But why must I be one of them?¨
Joseph Heller
Image
He was sick with lust and mesmerized with regret
Joseph Heller
Image
Insanity is contagious.
Joseph Heller
Image
You're an intelligent person of great moral character who has taken a very courageous stand. I'm an intelligent person with no moral character at all, so I'm in an ideal position to appreciate it.
Joseph Heller
Image
Maybe a long life does have to be filled with many unpleasant conditions if it's to seem long. But in that event, who wants one?
Joseph Heller
Image
When I grow up I want to be a little boy.
Joseph Heller
Image
A man's head is his castle.
Joseph Heller
Image
The promises of maniacs, like those of women, are not safely relied upon.
Joseph Heller
Image
And anything worth dying for
Joseph Heller
Image
There was no telling what people might find out once they felt free to ask whatever questions they wanted to.
Joseph Heller
Image
The night was full of horrors, and he thought he knew how Christ must have felt as he walked through the world, like a psychiatrist through a ward full of nuts.
Joseph Heller
Image
Prostitution gives her an opportunity to meet people. It provides fresh air and wholesome exercise, and it keeps her out of trouble.
Joseph Heller
Image
It's a wise person, I guess, who knows he's dumb, and an honest person who knows he's a liar. And it's a dumb person, I guess, whose convinced he's wise...-Bob Slocum
Joseph Heller
Image
History was a trash bag of random coincidences torn open in a wind. Surely, Watt with his steam engine, Faraday with his electric motor, and Edison with his incandescent light bulb did not have it as their goal to contribute to a fuel shortage some day that would place their countries at the mercy of Arab oil.
Joseph Heller
Image
...[A]nything worth dying for ... is certainly worth living for.
Joseph Heller
Image
What is a country? A country is a piece of land surrounded on all sides by boundaries, usually unnatural. Englishmen are dying for England, Americans are dying for America, Germans are dying for Germany, Russians are dying for Russia. There are now fifty or sixty countries fighting in this war. Surely so many countries can't all be worth dying for.
Joseph Heller
Image
What do you do when it rains? The captain answered frankly. I get wet.
Joseph Heller