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I can't start writing until I have a closing line.

Joseph Heller

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Joseph Heller
Age: 76 †
Born: 1923
Born: May 1
Died: 1999
Died: December 10
Autobiographer
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Screenwriter
Writer
New York City
New York
Writing
Closing
Line
Lines
Start

More quotes by Joseph Heller

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¨ Oh, I´m not complaining. I know there´s a war on. I know a lot of people are going to have to suffer for us to win it. But why must I be one of them?¨
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I could not write about a subject sacred to me because I would be too flippant. Fortunately, there are no subjects sacred to me.
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If God was dead, how could I feel this bad?
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He was sick with lust and mesmerized with regret
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Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them. With Major Major it had been all three. Even among men lacking all distinction he inevitably stood out as a man lacking more distinction than all the rest, and people who met him were always impressed by how unimpressive he was.
Joseph Heller
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He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.
Joseph Heller
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Peace on earth would mean the end of civilization as we know it.
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He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.
Joseph Heller
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Insanity is contagious.
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Prostitution gives her an opportunity to meet people. It provides fresh air and wholesome exercise, and it keeps her out of trouble.
Joseph Heller
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Everything passes. (That's what makes it endurable.)
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Nately had a bad start. He came from a good family.
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Hungry Joe collected lists of fatal diseases and arranged them in alphabetical order so that he could put his finger without delay on any one he wanted to worry about.
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History was a trash bag of random coincidences torn open in a wind. Surely, Watt with his steam engine, Faraday with his electric motor, and Edison with his incandescent light bulb did not have it as their goal to contribute to a fuel shortage some day that would place their countries at the mercy of Arab oil.
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He was a self-made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.
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And anything worth dying for
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In the long run, failure was the only thing that worked predictably. All else was accidental.
Joseph Heller
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The country was in peril he was jeopardizing his traditional rights of freedom and independence by daring to exercise them.
Joseph Heller
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If character is destiny, the good are damned.
Joseph Heller
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If Richard Nixon was second-rate, what in the world is third-rate?
Joseph Heller