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Everything passes. (That's what makes it endurable.)

Joseph Heller

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Joseph Heller
Age: 76 †
Born: 1923
Born: May 1
Died: 1999
Died: December 10
Autobiographer
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Screenwriter
Writer
New York City
New York
Endurable
Endurance
Passes
Makes
Everything

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There was no telling what people might find out once they felt free to ask whatever questions they wanted to.
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...[A]nything worth dying for ... is certainly worth living for.
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It's a wise person, I guess, who knows he's dumb, and an honest person who knows he's a liar. And it's a dumb person, I guess, whose convinced he's wise...-Bob Slocum
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Yossarian decided to change the subject. Now you're changing the subject. he pointed out diplomatically. I'll bet I can name two things to be miserable about for every one you can name to be thankful for.
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I don't believe in miracles because it's been a long time since we've had any.
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I think in every country that there is at least one executive who is scared of going crazy.
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Prostitution gives her an opportunity to meet people. It provides fresh air and wholesome exercise, and it keeps her out of trouble.
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History was a trash bag of random coincidences torn open in a wind. Surely, Watt with his steam engine, Faraday with his electric motor, and Edison with his incandescent light bulb did not have it as their goal to contribute to a fuel shortage some day that would place their countries at the mercy of Arab oil.
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Gold was not altogether certain what, anatomically, a gorge was, but he knew that his was rising.
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There is no disappointment so numbing...as someone no better than you achieving more.
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¨ Oh, I´m not complaining. I know there´s a war on. I know a lot of people are going to have to suffer for us to win it. But why must I be one of them?¨
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Hungry Joe collected lists of fatal diseases and arranged them in alphabetical order so that he could put his finger without delay on any one he wanted to worry about.
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Nately had a bad start. He came from a good family.
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How much reverence can you have for a Supreme Being who finds it necessary to include such phenomena as phlegm and tooth decay in His divine system of Creation? What in the world was running through that warped, evil, scatological mind of His when He robbed old people of the power to control their bowel movements?
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In the long run, failure was the only thing that worked predictably. All else was accidental.
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What is a country? A country is a piece of land surrounded on all sides by boundaries, usually unnatural. Englishmen are dying for England, Americans are dying for America, Germans are dying for Germany, Russians are dying for Russia. There are now fifty or sixty countries fighting in this war. Surely so many countries can't all be worth dying for.
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All through the night, men looked at the sky and were saddened by the stars.
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Now you've given them hope, and they're unhappy. So the blame is all yours.
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I'm gonna live forever, or die trying.
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Death to all modifiers, he declared one day, and out of every letter that passed through his hands went every adverb and every adjective.
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