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The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on.

Joseph Heller

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Joseph Heller
Age: 76 †
Born: 1923
Born: May 1
Died: 1999
Died: December 10
Autobiographer
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Screenwriter
Writer
New York City
New York
Going
Side
Sides
Enemy
Wisdom
Peace
War
Killed
Death
Suicide
Matter
Anybody

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The country was in peril he was jeopardizing his traditional rights of freedom and independence by daring to exercise them.
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When people disagreed with him he urged them to be objective.
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Where were you born? On a battlefield, [Yossarian] answered. No, no. In what state were you born? In a state of innocence.
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If Richard Nixon was second-rate, what in the world is third-rate?
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If God was dead, how could I feel this bad?
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I wouldn't want to live without strong misgivings.
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I want to keep my dreams, even bad ones, because without them, I might have nothing all night long.
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All of our religions but the Judaic and the Greek think more of us dead than alive.
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How much reverence can you have for a Supreme Being who finds it necessary to include such phenomena as phlegm and tooth decay in His divine system of Creation? What in the world was running through that warped, evil, scatological mind of His when He robbed old people of the power to control their bowel movements?
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I am miracle ingredient Z-247. I'm immense. I'm a real, slam-bang, honest-to-goodness, three-fisted humdinger. I'm a bona fide supraman.
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The night was full of horrors, and he thought he knew how Christ must have felt as he walked through the world, like a psychiatrist through a ward full of nuts.
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Yossarian decided to change the subject. Now you're changing the subject. he pointed out diplomatically. I'll bet I can name two things to be miserable about for every one you can name to be thankful for.
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It's a wise person, I guess, who knows he's dumb, and an honest person who knows he's a liar. And it's a dumb person, I guess, whose convinced he's wise...-Bob Slocum
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I could not write about a subject sacred to me because I would be too flippant. Fortunately, there are no subjects sacred to me.
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They couldn't keep Death out, but while she was in she had to act like a lady.
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He was a self-made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.
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Erogenous zones are either everywhere or nowhere.
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Gold was not altogether certain what, anatomically, a gorge was, but he knew that his was rising.
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Well then I'd certainly be a damned fool to feel any other way, wouldn't I?
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