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Maybe a long life does have to be filled with many unpleasant conditions if it's to seem long. But in that event, who wants one?

Joseph Heller

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Joseph Heller
Age: 76 †
Born: 1923
Born: May 1
Died: 1999
Died: December 10
Autobiographer
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Screenwriter
Writer
New York City
New York
Events
Wants
Maybe
Seems
Unpleasant
Doe
Event
Many
Filled
Long
Conditions
Life
Seem

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How much reverence can you have for a Supreme Being who finds it necessary to include such phenomena as phlegm and tooth decay in His divine system of Creation? What in the world was running through that warped, evil, scatological mind of His when He robbed old people of the power to control their bowel movements?
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In short, Clevinger was one of those people with lots of intelligence and no brains, and everyone knew it except those who soon found it out.
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Yossarian decided to change the subject. Now you're changing the subject. he pointed out diplomatically. I'll bet I can name two things to be miserable about for every one you can name to be thankful for.
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Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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He was a self-made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.
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Well, he died. You don't get any older than that.
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When I read something saying I've not done anything as good as 'Catch-22' I'm tempted to reply, 'Who has?'
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All of our religions but the Judaic and the Greek think more of us dead than alive.
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The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on.
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You're an intelligent person of great moral character who has taken a very courageous stand. I'm an intelligent person with no moral character at all, so I'm in an ideal position to appreciate it.
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From men motivated by moral certitude, history teaches, no lasting good ever comes.
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He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.
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The enemy, retorted Yossarian with weighted precision, is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on, and that includes Colonel Cathcart. And don't you forget that, because the longer you remember it, the longer you might live.
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Let's take a drive into the middle of nowhere with a packet of Marlboro lights and talk about our lives.
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There is no disappointment so numbing...as someone no better than you achieving more.
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I am miracle ingredient Z-247. I'm immense. I'm a real, slam-bang, honest-to-goodness, three-fisted humdinger. I'm a bona fide supraman.
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Hungry Joe collected lists of fatal diseases and arranged them in alphabetical order so that he could put his finger without delay on any one he wanted to worry about.
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He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.
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Rise above principal and do what's right.
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