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What do you do when it rains? The captain answered frankly. I get wet.

Joseph Heller

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Joseph Heller
Age: 76 †
Born: 1923
Born: May 1
Died: 1999
Died: December 10
Autobiographer
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Screenwriter
Writer
New York City
New York
Captains
Answered
Frankly
Rain
Rains
Captain
Wet

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I wouldn't want to live without strong misgivings.
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They couldn't keep Death out, but while she was in she had to act like a lady.
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There is no disappointment so numbing...as someone no better than you achieving more.
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Only Hungry Joe had something better to do each time he finished his missions. He had screaming nightmares and won fist fights with Huple's cat.
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Well, he died. You don't get any older than that.
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The laws of nature are only as immutable as the minds which promote them. Ignorance of the law is 9/10ths of the law. Just because you aren't paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you.
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What is a country? A country is a piece of land surrounded on all sides by boundaries, usually unnatural. Englishmen are dying for England, Americans are dying for America, Germans are dying for Germany, Russians are dying for Russia. There are now fifty or sixty countries fighting in this war. Surely so many countries can't all be worth dying for.
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Nurse Duckett found Yossarian wonderful and was already trying to change him.
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Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them. With Major Major it had been all three. Even among men lacking all distinction he inevitably stood out as a man lacking more distinction than all the rest, and people who met him were always impressed by how unimpressive he was.
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Everything passes. (That's what makes it endurable.)
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I'm gonna live forever, or die trying.
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Gold was not altogether certain what, anatomically, a gorge was, but he knew that his was rising.
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The night was full of horrors, and he thought he knew how Christ must have felt as he walked through the world, like a psychiatrist through a ward full of nuts.
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The enemy, retorted Yossarian with weighted precision, is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on, and that includes Colonel Cathcart. And don't you forget that, because the longer you remember it, the longer you might live.
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Prostitution gives her an opportunity to meet people. It provides fresh air and wholesome exercise, and it keeps her out of trouble.
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For war there is always enough. It's peace that's expensive.
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There was no telling what people might find out once they felt free to ask whatever questions they wanted to.
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Insanity is contagious.
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Nately had a bad start. He came from a good family.
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He was sick with lust and mesmerized with regret
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