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Yossarian decided to change the subject. Now you're changing the subject. he pointed out diplomatically. I'll bet I can name two things to be miserable about for every one you can name to be thankful for.

Joseph Heller

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Joseph Heller
Age: 76 †
Born: 1923
Born: May 1
Died: 1999
Died: December 10
Autobiographer
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Screenwriter
Writer
New York City
New York
Every
Changing
Things
Subject
Decided
Subjects
Name
Diplomatically
Names
Pointed
Two
Thankful
Change
Miserable

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The promises of maniacs, like those of women, are not safely relied upon.
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How much reverence can you have for a Supreme Being who finds it necessary to include such phenomena as phlegm and tooth decay in His divine system of Creation? What in the world was running through that warped, evil, scatological mind of His when He robbed old people of the power to control their bowel movements?
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If Richard Nixon was second-rate, what in the world is third-rate?
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The night was full of horrors, and he thought he knew how Christ must have felt as he walked through the world, like a psychiatrist through a ward full of nuts.
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There is no disappointment so numbing...as someone no better than you achieving more.
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Now you've given them hope, and they're unhappy. So the blame is all yours.
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What is a country? A country is a piece of land surrounded on all sides by boundaries, usually unnatural. Englishmen are dying for England, Americans are dying for America, Germans are dying for Germany, Russians are dying for Russia. There are now fifty or sixty countries fighting in this war. Surely so many countries can't all be worth dying for.
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It's a wise person, I guess, who knows he's dumb, and an honest person who knows he's a liar. And it's a dumb person, I guess, whose convinced he's wise...-Bob Slocum
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All through the night, men looked at the sky and were saddened by the stars.
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From men motivated by moral certitude, history teaches, no lasting good ever comes.
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Every writer I know has trouble writing.
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Rise above principal and do what's right.
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The body stores the trauma of our lives in muscular rigidity, thereby keeping us stuck in the past. When we release the tension in the body and align ourselves with gravity, we take a new stand in life. This allows us to be at ease with ourselves and in harmony in our relationship to others and to our planet.
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Death to all modifiers, he declared one day, and out of every letter that passed through his hands went every adverb and every adjective.
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I think that maybe inside any business, there is someone slowly going crazy
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He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.
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Insanity is contagious.
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There was no telling what people might find out once they felt free to ask whatever questions they wanted to.
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Nurse Duckett found Yossarian wonderful and was already trying to change him.
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He was a self-made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.
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