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It's a wise person, I guess, who knows he's dumb, and an honest person who knows he's a liar. And it's a dumb person, I guess, whose convinced he's wise...-Bob Slocum
Joseph Heller
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Joseph Heller
Age: 76 †
Born: 1923
Born: May 1
Died: 1999
Died: December 10
Autobiographer
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Screenwriter
Writer
New York City
New York
Whose
Honest
Wise
Liar
Persons
Bob
Person
Liars
Dumb
Convinced
Guess
More quotes by Joseph Heller
From men motivated by moral certitude, history teaches, no lasting good ever comes.
Joseph Heller
Just for once I'd like to see all these things sort of straightened out, with each person getting exactly what he deserves. It might give me some confidence in this universe.
Joseph Heller
Death to all modifiers, he declared one day, and out of every letter that passed through his hands went every adverb and every adjective.
Joseph Heller
Insanity is contagious.
Joseph Heller
And anything worth dying for
Joseph Heller
The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on.
Joseph Heller
I can't start writing until I have a closing line.
Joseph Heller
He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.
Joseph Heller
A man's head is his castle.
Joseph Heller
What do you do when it rains? The captain answered frankly. I get wet.
Joseph Heller
What is a country? A country is a piece of land surrounded on all sides by boundaries, usually unnatural. Englishmen are dying for England, Americans are dying for America, Germans are dying for Germany, Russians are dying for Russia. There are now fifty or sixty countries fighting in this war. Surely so many countries can't all be worth dying for.
Joseph Heller
There's a rule saying I have to ground anyone who's crazy ... There's a catch. Catch-22. Anyone who wants to get out of combat duty isn't really crazy.
Joseph Heller
Maybe a long life does have to be filled with many unpleasant conditions if it's to seem long. But in that event, who wants one?
Joseph Heller
There is no disappointment so numbing...as someone no better than you achieving more.
Joseph Heller
I had examined myself pretty thoroughly and discovered that I was unfit for military service.
Joseph Heller
Under Colonel Korn's rule, the only people permitted to ask questions were those who never did.
Joseph Heller
All of our religions but the Judaic and the Greek think more of us dead than alive.
Joseph Heller
Every writer I know has trouble writing.
Joseph Heller
For war there is always enough. It's peace that's expensive.
Joseph Heller
I think that maybe inside any business, there is someone slowly going crazy
Joseph Heller