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¨ Oh, I´m not complaining. I know there´s a war on. I know a lot of people are going to have to suffer for us to win it. But why must I be one of them?¨

Joseph Heller

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Joseph Heller
Age: 76 †
Born: 1923
Born: May 1
Died: 1999
Died: December 10
Autobiographer
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Screenwriter
Writer
New York City
New York
Going
People
Complaining
Suffer
Winning
Suffering
War
Must

More quotes by Joseph Heller

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All of our religions but the Judaic and the Greek think more of us dead than alive.
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He was sick with lust and mesmerized with regret
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I think in every country that there is at least one executive who is scared of going crazy.
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I'll tell you what justice is. Justice is a knee in the gut from the floor on the chin at night sneaky with a knife brought up down on the magazine of a battleship sandbagged underhanded in the dark without a word of warning
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When people disagreed with him he urged them to be objective.
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I had examined myself pretty thoroughly and discovered that I was unfit for military service.
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Gold was not altogether certain what, anatomically, a gorge was, but he knew that his was rising.
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In short, Clevinger was one of those people with lots of intelligence and no brains, and everyone knew it except those who soon found it out.
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The enemy, retorted Yossarian with weighted precision, is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on, and that includes Colonel Cathcart. And don't you forget that, because the longer you remember it, the longer you might live.
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The night was full of horrors, and he thought he knew how Christ must have felt as he walked through the world, like a psychiatrist through a ward full of nuts.
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Only Hungry Joe had something better to do each time he finished his missions. He had screaming nightmares and won fist fights with Huple's cat.
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I don't believe in miracles because it's been a long time since we've had any.
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For war there is always enough. It's peace that's expensive.
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How much reverence can you have for a Supreme Being who finds it necessary to include such phenomena as phlegm and tooth decay in His divine system of Creation? What in the world was running through that warped, evil, scatological mind of His when He robbed old people of the power to control their bowel movements?
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It made him proud that 29 months in the service had not blunted his genius for ineptitude.
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I could not write about a subject sacred to me because I would be too flippant. Fortunately, there are no subjects sacred to me.
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I want to keep my dreams, even bad ones, because without them, I might have nothing all night long.
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The laws of nature are only as immutable as the minds which promote them. Ignorance of the law is 9/10ths of the law. Just because you aren't paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you.
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Well, he died. You don't get any older than that.
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Under Colonel Korn's rule, the only people permitted to ask questions were those who never did.
Joseph Heller