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¨ Oh, I´m not complaining. I know there´s a war on. I know a lot of people are going to have to suffer for us to win it. But why must I be one of them?¨

Joseph Heller

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Joseph Heller
Age: 76 †
Born: 1923
Born: May 1
Died: 1999
Died: December 10
Autobiographer
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Screenwriter
Writer
New York City
New York
Winning
Suffering
War
Must
Going
People
Complaining
Suffer

More quotes by Joseph Heller

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Under Colonel Korn's rule, the only people permitted to ask questions were those who never did.
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Everything passes. (That's what makes it endurable.)
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Hasn't it ever occurred to you that in your promiscuous pursuit of women you are merely trying to assuage your subconscious fears of sexual impotence? Yes, sir, it has. Then why do you do it? To assuage my fears of sexual impotence.
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I'll tell you what justice is. Justice is a knee in the gut from the floor on the chin at night sneaky with a knife brought up down on the magazine of a battleship sandbagged underhanded in the dark without a word of warning
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Peace on earth would mean the end of civilization as we know it.
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I wouldn't want to live without strong misgivings.
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Every writer I know has trouble writing.
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He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.
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I could not write about a subject sacred to me because I would be too flippant. Fortunately, there are no subjects sacred to me.
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Death to all modifiers, he declared one day, and out of every letter that passed through his hands went every adverb and every adjective.
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I think that maybe inside any business, there is someone slowly going crazy
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where are the snowdens of yesteryear?
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The laws of nature are only as immutable as the minds which promote them. Ignorance of the law is 9/10ths of the law. Just because you aren't paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you.
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Nately had a bad start. He came from a good family.
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How much reverence can you have for a Supreme Being who finds it necessary to include such phenomena as phlegm and tooth decay in His divine system of Creation? What in the world was running through that warped, evil, scatological mind of His when He robbed old people of the power to control their bowel movements?
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Erogenous zones are either everywhere or nowhere.
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All of our religions but the Judaic and the Greek think more of us dead than alive.
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He was sick with lust and mesmerized with regret
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There's a rule saying I have to ground anyone who's crazy ... There's a catch. Catch-22. Anyone who wants to get out of combat duty isn't really crazy.
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Yossarian decided to change the subject. Now you're changing the subject. he pointed out diplomatically. I'll bet I can name two things to be miserable about for every one you can name to be thankful for.
Joseph Heller