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He was a self-made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.

Joseph Heller

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Joseph Heller
Age: 76 †
Born: 1923
Born: May 1
Died: 1999
Died: December 10
Autobiographer
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Screenwriter
Writer
New York City
New York
Effort
Success
Self
Made
Men
Owed
Lack
Failure
Nobody

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He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.
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Let's take a drive into the middle of nowhere with a packet of Marlboro lights and talk about our lives.
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Death to all modifiers, he declared one day, and out of every letter that passed through his hands went every adverb and every adjective.
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Destiny is a good thing to accept when it's going your way. When it isn't, don't call it destiny call it injustice, treachery, or simple bad luck.
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If God was dead, how could I feel this bad?
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I'm gonna live forever, or die trying.
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Insanity is contagious.
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For war there is always enough. It's peace that's expensive.
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The enemy, retorted Yossarian with weighted precision, is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on, and that includes Colonel Cathcart. And don't you forget that, because the longer you remember it, the longer you might live.
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Every writer I know has trouble writing.
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I can't start writing until I have a closing line.
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In the long run, failure was the only thing that worked predictably. All else was accidental.
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Nurse Duckett found Yossarian wonderful and was already trying to change him.
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Where were you born? On a battlefield, [Yossarian] answered. No, no. In what state were you born? In a state of innocence.
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Everybody is as unstable as water.
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What do you do when it rains? The captain answered frankly. I get wet.
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Rise above principal and do what's right.
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When I read something saying I've not done anything as good as 'Catch-22' I'm tempted to reply, 'Who has?'
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...[A]nything worth dying for ... is certainly worth living for.
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Under Colonel Korn's rule, the only people permitted to ask questions were those who never did.
Joseph Heller