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Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust upon them.

Joseph Heller

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Joseph Heller
Age: 76 †
Born: 1923
Born: May 1
Died: 1999
Died: December 10
Autobiographer
Journalist
Novelist
Playwright
Prosaist
Screenwriter
Writer
New York City
New York
Upon
Success
Born
People
Thrust
Mediocre
Mediocrity
Humorous
Achieve

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Hasn't it ever occurred to you that in your promiscuous pursuit of women you are merely trying to assuage your subconscious fears of sexual impotence? Yes, sir, it has. Then why do you do it? To assuage my fears of sexual impotence.
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There's a rule saying I have to ground anyone who's crazy ... There's a catch. Catch-22. Anyone who wants to get out of combat duty isn't really crazy.
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mankind is resilient: the atrocities that horrified us a week ago become acceptable tomorrow.
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Now you've given them hope, and they're unhappy. So the blame is all yours.
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I think that maybe inside any business, there is someone slowly going crazy
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The enemy is anybody who's going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on.
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Let's take a drive into the middle of nowhere with a packet of Marlboro lights and talk about our lives.
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Under Colonel Korn's rule, the only people permitted to ask questions were those who never did.
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There was no telling what people might find out once they felt free to ask whatever questions they wanted to.
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Insanity is contagious.
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The body stores the trauma of our lives in muscular rigidity, thereby keeping us stuck in the past. When we release the tension in the body and align ourselves with gravity, we take a new stand in life. This allows us to be at ease with ourselves and in harmony in our relationship to others and to our planet.
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I could not write about a subject sacred to me because I would be too flippant. Fortunately, there are no subjects sacred to me.
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If Richard Nixon was second-rate, what in the world is third-rate?
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It made him proud that 29 months in the service had not blunted his genius for ineptitude.
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I can't start writing until I have a closing line.
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What do you do when it rains? The captain answered frankly. I get wet.
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Hungry Joe collected lists of fatal diseases and arranged them in alphabetical order so that he could put his finger without delay on any one he wanted to worry about.
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Only Hungry Joe had something better to do each time he finished his missions. He had screaming nightmares and won fist fights with Huple's cat.
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All through the night, men looked at the sky and were saddened by the stars.
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Where were you born? On a battlefield, [Yossarian] answered. No, no. In what state were you born? In a state of innocence.
Joseph Heller