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A college joke to cure the dumps.
Jonathan Swift
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Jonathan Swift
Age: 77 †
Born: 1667
Born: November 30
Died: 1745
Died: October 19
Essayist
Human Rights Activist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Pamphleteer
Philosopher
Poet
Priest
Prosaist
Public Figure
Dublin city
Isaac Bickerstaff
M. B. Drapier
Lemuel Gulliver
Simon Wagstaff
Jokes
College
Dumps
Dump
Cure
Cures
Joke
More quotes by Jonathan Swift
Lose no time to contradict her, Nor endeavor to convict her Only take this rule along, Always to advise her wrong, And reprove her when she's right She may then grow wise for spite.
Jonathan Swift
A wise man will find us to be rogues by our faces.
Jonathan Swift
There is nothing constant in this world but inconsistency.
Jonathan Swift
A tavern is a place where madness is sold by the bottle.
Jonathan Swift
A carpenter is known by his chips.
Jonathan Swift
War: that mad game the world so loves to play.
Jonathan Swift
For in reason, all government without the consent of the governed is the very definition of slavery.
Jonathan Swift
Although men are accused of not knowing their own weakness, yet perhaps few know their own strength. It is in men as in soils, where sometimes there is a vein of gold which the owner knows not of.
Jonathan Swift
Praise is the daughter of present power.
Jonathan Swift
Nor do they trust their tongue alone, but speak a language of their own can read a nod, a shrug, a look, far better than a printed book convey a libel in a frown, and wink a reputation down.
Jonathan Swift
She has more goodness in her little finger than he has in his whole body.
Jonathan Swift
That incessant envy wherewith the common rate of mankind pursues all superior natures to their own.
Jonathan Swift
By candle-light nobody would have taken you for above five-and-twenty.
Jonathan Swift
Many a truth is told in jest.
Jonathan Swift
Pride, ill nature, and want of sense are the three great sources of ill manners without some one of these defects, no man will behave himself ill for want of experience, or what, in the language of fools, is called knowing the world.
Jonathan Swift
I won't quarrel with my bread and butter.
Jonathan Swift
My father had a small Estate in Nottinghamshire I was the Third of five Sons.
Jonathan Swift
Polite Conversation Why, everyone one as they like as the good woman said when she kissed her cow.
Jonathan Swift
Men are happy to be laughed at for their humor, but not for their folly.
Jonathan Swift
Conversation is but carving! Give no more to every guest Than he's able to digest.
Jonathan Swift
