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I wonder what fool it was that first invented kissing.

Jonathan Swift

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Jonathan Swift
Age: 77 †
Born: 1667
Born: November 30
Died: 1745
Died: October 19
Essayist
Human Rights Activist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Pamphleteer
Philosopher
Poet
Priest
Prosaist
Public Figure
Dublin city
Isaac Bickerstaff
M. B. Drapier
Lemuel Gulliver
Simon Wagstaff
Firsts
First
Invented
Kissing
Fool
Inspiration
Wonder
Funny

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I row after health like a waterman.
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I'll give you leave to call me anything, if you don't call me spade.
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There are few, very few, that will own themselves in a mistake.
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Faith, that's as well said as if I had said it myself.
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She has more goodness in her little finger than he has in his whole body.
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Whence proceeds this weight we lay On what detracting people say? Their utmost malice cannot make Your head, or tooth, or finger ache Nor spoil your shapes, distort your face, Or put one feature out of place.
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That the universe was formed by a fortuitous concourse of atoms, I will no more believe than that the accidental jumbling of the alphabet would fall into a most ingenious treatise of philosophy.
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Books, like men their authors, have no more than one wayofcoming intothe world, but there areten thousand to go out of it, and return no more.
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What religion is he of? Why, he is an Anythingarian.
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Nothing is so great an example of bad manners as flattery. If you flatter all the company, you please none If you flatter only one or two, you offend the rest.
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Arbitrary power is but the first natural step from anarchy, or the savage life.
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Two women seldom grow intimate but at the expense of a third person.
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An atheist has got one point beyond the devil.
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For poetry, he's past his prime, He takes an hour to find a rhyme His fire is out, his wit decayed, His fancy sunk, his muse a jade. I'd have him throw away his pen, But there's no talking to some men.
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Surely mortal man is a broomstick!
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There never appear more than five or six men of genius in an age, but if they were united the world could not stand before them.
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Fools are apt to imitate only the defects of their betters.
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O Grub Street! how do I bemoan thee, whose graceless children scorn to own thee! . Yet thou hast greater cause to be ashamed of them, than they of thee.
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For, if we take an examination of what is generally understood by happiness, as it has respect either to the understanding or the senses, we shall find all its properties and adjuncts will herd under this short definition: that it is a perpetual possession of being well deceived.
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