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The psychology degree is simply that I was a chemistry major, and they kept wanting the correct answer, whereas in psychology you basically write whatever you want, and chances are you get a B.
Jon Stewart
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Jon Stewart
Age: 61
Born: 1962
Born: November 28
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Manhattan borough
New York City
Jonathan Jon Stewart
Jonathan Stuart Leibowitz
Jonathan Stewart
Write
Kept
Chemistry
Writing
Major
Whereas
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Answer
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Answers
Psychology
Simply
Degree
Chance
Basically
Whatever
Majors
Chances
More quotes by Jon Stewart
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High school. You know, people say, 'I'll never do so-and-so again' - then they do it. So what? Sometimes somebody has crack, and you're looking to stay awake.
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The press has bravely and nobly eroded the public trust... What I'm advocating is the media come work for us again. Remove themselves from the symbiotic relationship that they have developed with the power structure of corporations and of the politicians.
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Sitting around with funny people, banging out jokes and creating a television show. I have no hobbies, no outside interests. I'm fine with spending 14 hours a day putting a show together with tape and string.
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It's very hard to feel the difficulties that the military goes through. It's very hard to feel the difficulties of military families, unless you're in that environment. And sometimes you have to force yourself to try and put yourself in other people's sort of shoes and environment to get the sense of that.
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I feel your scorn, and I accept it.
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We called her Mother Earth. Because she gave birth to us, and then we sucked her dry.
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The problem with the Tea Party is they're all ignorant hillbillies who drink moonshine and ride around on mules. And they believe in stereotypes too.
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I have the liberal dictionary right here...let's see how they define water-boarding: 'Something done by the evil troops, who we don't support, to innocent terrorists violating their rights to bomb our cities and make us get gay marriage.'
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Who cares how we avoided a war and got a dictator to give up his chemical weapons if we avoided a war and got a dictator to give up his chemical weapons.
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They create these rules and argue about things we don't even understand. It is like watching soccer. You sit there and you're sort of amused, but most of the time you're thinking, pick up the ball! That's what you're thinking.
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Nobody out-rednecks the great state of America.
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I was born with an adult head and a tiny body. Like a 'Peanuts' character.
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Ahh, Earth Day, the only day of the year where being able to hacky-sack will get you laid.
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Everybody wrings their hands about Fox News. You know, fair and balanced? Why, that's snide! Yeah, okay, maybe they're not fair and balanced, but CNN used to have the slogan You Can Depend on CNN. Guess what? I watch it, no you can't. So what's the difference?
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It's always funny until the hooker mentions her son.
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The Vietnam war was fought over portion size.
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Comedy is the only form of entertainment where the audience doesn't know what to expect. In an evening, you might get ten comics doing ten different things. That's not what happens when you go to hear music. There isn't a classical performance followed by a hoedown followed by rap.
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