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If the guy in front of you at the polls has arm swords, you might want to considering filling out an absentee ballot.
Jon Stewart
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Jon Stewart
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: November 28
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Manhattan borough
New York City
Jonathan Jon Stewart
Jonathan Stuart Leibowitz
Jonathan Stewart
Arms
Swords
Guy
Ballot
Might
Ballots
Polls
Filling
Considering
Fronts
Front
Absentee
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College is something you complete. Life is something you experience. So don't worry about your grade, or the results or success. Success is defined in myriad ways, and you will find it, and people will no longer be grading you, but it will come from your own internal sense of decency.
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As we approach the millennium with sort of the idea that society is going to start spiraling into chaos, I'd love to be making jokes about that. Who wants to miss out on that? If the world is going to end, I want to be there the night before, goofing off.
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So if you're negative, you live longer? That sounds like a cruel joke.
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I feel your scorn, and I accept it.
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I'm less upset with politicians than the media. I feel like politicians, there is a certain, inherent - you know, the way I always explain it is, when you go to the zoo and a monkey throws its feces, it's a monkey. But, when the zookeeper is standing right there, and he doesn't say bad monkey... Somebody's got to be the zookeeper.
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I mean, I'm not hoping for the apes and the monolith. I'm hoping for controlled chaos to assist us.
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I don't care about wealth. What seems to be upsetting is institutionalizing the advantages that wealth gives you.
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I'm not trying to be modest of self-deprecating or in any way trying to do that.
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And try as I might, I am having difficulty giving a f**k.
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When you are actually powerful, you don't need to be petty.
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As long as I don't end up hosting a skin care commercial with Cher, I'm happy.
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