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Sometimes it's hard to face your own...life.
Jon Stewart
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Jon Stewart
Age: 61
Born: 1962
Born: November 28
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Manhattan borough
New York City
Jonathan Jon Stewart
Jonathan Stuart Leibowitz
Jonathan Stewart
Life
Face
Faces
Hard
Sometimes
More quotes by Jon Stewart
A joke is a joke. There's an expression - I don't know if you have it - that's 'adding insult to injury.'
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The Internet is just a world passing around notes in a classroom. That's all it is. All those media companies say, We're going to make a killing here. You won't because it's still only as good as the content.
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Nazi Germany was so destructive to Judaism not only for the loss of life, but because many who survived began to see the practice of Judaism as somewhat of a health hazard.
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You wonder sometimes how our government puts on its pants in the morning.
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Planet Hollywood has shrunk from seventy-five locations around the world to just over thirty-five over the past two years. No new Planet Hollywoods are opening, which in turn has caused a 100 percent decline in opportunities for Bruce Willis to play the harmonica.
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The Rapture: The ultimate Republican back-up plan.
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Yon Kippur. Greatest Jewish holiday ever. The Jewish day of attonement. You don't ear for one day, all your sins for the year are wiped clean. Beat that with your little Lent. What is Lent? Forty days of absolution. Forty days to one day. Even in sin you're paying retail.
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Usually when Obama says, 'Let me be clear,' he's about to get into some very unclear sh*t.
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People don't understand that we're not warriors in their cause. We're a group of people that really feel that they want to write jokes about the absurdity that we see in government and the world and all that, and that's it.
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As a comedian, as a person, as a citizen, as a mammal - in all of those areas, I am looking forward to the end of the Bush administration with every fiber of my being.
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It's not really a good sign when your audience applauds Satan.
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Everything in Italian sounds like 'Give me your money or I'm going to beat your @$$'.
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They may want to insist that corporations are people but corporations are certainly not Americans.
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The government that governs best, governs best!
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I feel like [God]'s hazing us.
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Watching Fox, that's like watching the Cartoon Network. Fox is nuts.
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Give me back the $800 billion for the Iraq war and children's television PBS is on the house.
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If everything is amplified, we hear nothing.
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[Doogal] wasn't even animated. It was still and the audience had to move.
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The seven marvels that best represent man's achievements over the last 2,000 years will be determined by Internet vote... so look for Howard Stern's Private Parts to come in No. 1.
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