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What's it called when a hellhole hits a cataclysm? A catastro[phrack]. I just coined that, didn't I?

Jon Stewart

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Jon Stewart
Age: 61
Born: 1962
Born: November 28
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Manhattan borough
New York City
Jonathan Jon Stewart
Jonathan Stuart Leibowitz
Jonathan Stewart
Coined
Hits
Called
Didn
Cataclysm

More quotes by Jon Stewart

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To the people who are upset about their hard-earned tax money going to things they don’t like: welcome to the f*cking club. Reimburse me for the Iraq war and oil subsidies, and diaphragms are on me!
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Ah, the first rule of public speaking -- always start with a joke.
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[Doogal] wasn't even animated. It was still and the audience had to move.
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I don't care about wealth. What seems to be upsetting is institutionalizing the advantages that wealth gives you.
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The problem with the Tea Party is they're all ignorant hillbillies who drink moonshine and ride around on mules. And they believe in stereotypes too.
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Everybody thought Barack Obama was going to [inspire people] when he came to Washington, but, you know, the Senate seems like the place where smart people go to die.
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And try as I might, I am having difficulty giving a f**k.
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To me, that's where a lot of satire lies. News used to hold itself to a higher plane and slowly it has dissolved into, well, me.
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In case you're wondering what we all do here during the commercial breaks, mostly we just sit around making catty remarks about the outfits you're all wearing at home.
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If your regime is not strong enough to handle a joke, then you don't have a regime.
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The American people, or at least the ones that I get on the subway with - they know there's a real threat out there. They felt like Iraq lessened our ability to fight that threat.
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If you smell something, say something.
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[CNN, USA Today] they've got 24 hours to fill. You know, how many times can Anna Nicole Smith's baby get a new father?
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You're on CNN. The show that leads into me is puppets making crank phone calls. What is wrong with you?
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Give me back the $800 billion for the Iraq war and children's television PBS is on the house.
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You cannot judge a book by its contents.
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I'm not trying to be modest of self-deprecating or in any way trying to do that.
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If I could be really competent, that goes such a long way toward things, because the majority of things are not competent. If I can be competent, and have moments of originality, that's all I would ask for.
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Many of our soldiers are stationed at Camp Coyote just south of the Iraqi border. This is how you know we have a strong army, when you can actually tell your enemy exactly where your camp is and what its name is.
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Corporations are the only reason the tax code is so complicated in the first place. Those off-shore loopholes didn't get carved out by poor people.
Jon Stewart