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Everybody thought Barack Obama was going to [inspire people] when he came to Washington, but, you know, the Senate seems like the place where smart people go to die.

Jon Stewart

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Jon Stewart
Age: 61
Born: 1962
Born: November 28
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Manhattan borough
New York City
Jonathan Jon Stewart
Jonathan Stuart Leibowitz
Jonathan Stewart
Dies
Place
Senate
Thought
Washington
Seems
Obama
Going
Inspire
Like
Smart
People
Everybody
Came

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I think you lose your innocence when you have kids, because the world suddenly becomes a much more dangerous place.
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Child: Why on this night do we eat Hot Fudge Sundaes? Adult: To remind us that being Jewish is like having your birthday every day!! Plus they're delicious!
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Hopefully the only things off-limits are crummy jokes, but being a standup comedian, I know that's not always the case... You know it when you have to take a shower afterward.
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To me, that's where a lot of satire lies. News used to hold itself to a higher plane and slowly it has dissolved into, well, me.
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I don't care about wealth. What seems to be upsetting is institutionalizing the advantages that wealth gives you.
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I want a sandwich named after me.
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If you don't stick to your values when they're being tested, they're not values: they're hobbies.
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I like not to be good at anything, so I keep hopping around.
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I was born with an adult head and a tiny body. Like a 'Peanuts' character.
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You've confused a war on your religion with not always getting everything you want.
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Ahh, Earth Day, the only day of the year where being able to hacky-sack will get you laid.
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