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On an average day 7 minutes of news happens. Yet there are currently three full-time, 24-hour news networks.
Jon Stewart
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Jon Stewart
Age: 61
Born: 1962
Born: November 28
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Manhattan borough
New York City
Jonathan Jon Stewart
Jonathan Stuart Leibowitz
Jonathan Stewart
Time
Average
News
Minutes
Full
Hours
Society
Networks
Three
Currently
Happens
Hour
More quotes by Jon Stewart
Parenthood is an amazing opportunity to be able to ruin someone from scratch.
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I thought we were out of money!? You can't simultaneously fire teachers AND tomahawk missiles.
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As we approach the millennium with sort of the idea that society is going to start spiraling into chaos, I'd love to be making jokes about that. Who wants to miss out on that? If the world is going to end, I want to be there the night before, goofing off.
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They may want to insist that corporations are people but corporations are certainly not Americans.
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Sometimes it's hard to face your own...life.
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The only time a politico will try to avoid playing the blame game is when they or theirs are to blame.
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Here it is. My moment of zen.
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[He died of thirst?] That sounds, if I might say, like the greatest Sprite commercial ever.
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I wonder who really is the change candidate? It can't be both of them [Hillary Clinton & Barak Obama]. What would be a black man and a woman - how could that be different than the 43 other Presidents we've had?
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Being funny in life is a lot more like judo. It's using the energy.
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Technology. It's like science, only useless.
Jon Stewart
The United States Central Command of the Armed Forces has asked Geraldo Rivera to leave Iraq. It should also be noted that the only three other people that the U.S. military has asked to leave Iraq are Saddam Hussein and his two sons.
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How refreshing. A suspect beaten up BEFORE the LAPD showed up.
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Do you know how many movies I wrote when I was high?
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Critics have noted Schwarzenegger's only previous government experience was serving under President Bush senior as Chairman of the Council of Physical Fitness, a largely symbolic office, where Schwarzenegger's only responsibility was doing hundreds of jumping jacks he was going to do anyway.
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Comedy is the only form of entertainment where the audience doesn't know what to expect. In an evening, you might get ten comics doing ten different things. That's not what happens when you go to hear music. There isn't a classical performance followed by a hoedown followed by rap.
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So, is there hope for a truly democratic Africa? Long answer: Only if continent-wide improvements in education, human rights and public health are coupled with an aggressive and far-sighted debt-relief program that breaks the cycle of subsistence farming and urban squalor. Short answer: No.
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When you think about it, Alaska is also near the North Pole, so she must also be friends with Santa.
Jon Stewart
I'm not trying to be modest of self-deprecating or in any way trying to do that.
Jon Stewart
I'm doing everything I can to sabotage my career. It's a little thing called fear of success.
Jon Stewart
