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When you are actually powerful, you don't need to be petty.
Jon Stewart
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Jon Stewart
Age: 61
Born: 1962
Born: November 28
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Manhattan borough
New York City
Jonathan Jon Stewart
Jonathan Stuart Leibowitz
Jonathan Stewart
Petty
Powerful
Actually
Need
Needs
More quotes by Jon Stewart
Making it [St. Patrick's Day] a great day for the Irish, but just an ok day if you're looking for a quiet tavern to talk, read or have a white wine spritzer.
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When the court that handpicked you to be president tells you you've overstepped your bounds, you've overstepped your bounds.
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I'm doing everything I can to sabotage my career. It's a little thing called fear of success.
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A guy who says what people who aren't thinking are thinking.
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Here's the way I look at it. President Bush has uranium-tipped bunker busters and I have puns. I think he'll be OK.
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Nazi Germany was so destructive to Judaism not only for the loss of life, but because many who survived began to see the practice of Judaism as somewhat of a health hazard.
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By the way, when you finish the bottle of Crown Royal, you can still use the pouch to hold your broken dreams.
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If everything is amplified, we hear nothing.
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As long as I don't end up hosting a skin care commercial with Cher, I'm happy.
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Wow, the entire network of anchors has been hired to be the press secretary.
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The best way to describe my ability was to say that after the game the other kids would say to me, 'Way to try!'
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In 1982 I was playing soccer at William and Mary, and a kid from Randolph-Macon called me a kike. I ran after him. 'I'm not a... well, yes I am.
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You're on CNN. The show that leads into me is puppets making crank phone calls. What is wrong with you?
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Michael Brown, the director of FEMA, was nominated by President Bush in 2003 and plans to start the job any day now. ... Prior to heading FEMA, Brown spent the 90's as a commissioner -- this is true -- of the International Arabian Horse Association. I guess he stands out because most Bush appointees are beholden to Arabian people.
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Everything is presented in as devious a manner as it could possibly be presented.
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You cannot judge a book by its contents.
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It really does seem that the Democrat's problem isn't that they're calling for timetables - it's that they're calling them 'timetables'. You're up against Bush and the Republicans - you've got to bring some zing. Don't call them timetables - call them 'Patriot Dates', 'Freedom Deadlines'... 'Glory Goals'.
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There is going to come a day when everyone here is going to need keen observation and wit to ridicule George W. Bush. But when that day comes, all we're going to have are tired puns and goofy looks. Because as you would say, we're suffering from the soft bigotry of low expectorations.
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