Quote

A guy comes down to earth, takes your sins, dies, and comes back three days later. You believe in him and go to heaven forever. How do you get from that to Hide-The-Eggs? Did Jesus have a problem with eggs? Did he go, When I come back, if I see any eggs, the whole salvation thing is off.

Jon Stewart

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Jon Stewart
Age: 61
Born: 1962
Born: November 28
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Manhattan borough
New York City
Jonathan Jon Stewart
Jonathan Stuart Leibowitz
Jonathan Stewart
Problem
Forever
Eggs
Back
Guy
Sins
Come
Dies
Hide
Whole
Heaven
Salvation
Thing
Jesus
Later
Believe
Comes
Sin
Three
Takes
Earth
Days
Easter

More quotes by Jon Stewart

Image
Who cares how we avoided a war and got a dictator to give up his chemical weapons if we avoided a war and got a dictator to give up his chemical weapons.
Jon Stewart
Image
The government should stop meddling in the business of the farmers, who would actually still be living ina desert if not for government meddling.
Jon Stewart
Image
Comedy is the only form of entertainment where the audience doesn't know what to expect. In an evening, you might get ten comics doing ten different things. That's not what happens when you go to hear music. There isn't a classical performance followed by a hoedown followed by rap.
Jon Stewart
Image
Nazi Germany was so destructive to Judaism not only for the loss of life, but because many who survived began to see the practice of Judaism as somewhat of a health hazard.
Jon Stewart
Image
You know if I had nickel for every time Bush has mentioned 9/11, I could raise enough reward money to go after Bin Laden.
Jon Stewart
Image
The danger of oppression is not just being oppressed, it's becoming an oppressor.
Jon Stewart
Image
Nathan Lane's Bus of Broadway Fun will be leaving shortly.
Jon Stewart
Image
It is hard to get mad at Donald Trump for saying stupid things, in the same way you don't get mad at a monkey when he throws poop at you at the zoo... What does get me angry is the ridiculous, disingenuous defending of the poop-throwing monkey.
Jon Stewart
Image
California is choosing between the lesser of, uh, 300 evils.
Jon Stewart
Image
Bad jokes, and gay marriage are destroying this country - but torture can save it.
Jon Stewart
Image
President Bush's approval ratings have taken somewhat of a dive. A senior slump, if you will. Leading President Bush to one conclusion: He is the only one who realizes what a great job he's being doing.
Jon Stewart
Image
The wisdom of the masses is not always wise. You could put a lot of things to a vote-you could have put anti-miscegenation laws to a vote, and that would have passed pretty handily. Either all people are created equal-or they're not. You're either buying into the original premise of America-or you're not.
Jon Stewart
Image
War that hasn't affected us here, in the way that you would imagine a five-year war would affect a country.
Jon Stewart
Image
[Doogal] wasn't even animated. It was still and the audience had to move.
Jon Stewart
Image
[John McCain] didn't believe me. I think anybody who's been in a POW camp for five years can - take eight minutes on The Daily Show.
Jon Stewart
Image
Fire up your heart for the wind is getting cold, now it always gets cold for the riders of the night. When you carry that dream when you know what lonesome is looking for a home like a bird in flight.
Jon Stewart
Image
Capote, of course, addressed very similar themes to Good Night and Good Luck. Both films are about determined journalists defying obstacles in a relentless pursuit of the truth. Needless to say, both are period pieces.
Jon Stewart
Image
Senator John McCain, who spent over five years in a Vietnamese POW camp, publicly releases 1,000 pages of medical records. Now people are left with only open nagging questions: what kind of freak has 1,000 pages of medical records?
Jon Stewart
Image
Our culture is just a series of checks and balances. The whole idea that we're in a battle between tyranny and freedom - it's a series of pendulum swings.
Jon Stewart
Image
Whenever you take over something that is popular and has a fanatical following that loves it, you're never going to please everyone. The trick is to have enough wherewithal to follow through with what you want to do with it and give it time to evolve.
Jon Stewart