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I've always run by the hierarchy of If not funny, interesting. If not interesting, hot. If not hot, bizarre. If not bizarre, break something.

Jon Stewart

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Jon Stewart
Age: 61
Born: 1962
Born: November 28
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Manhattan borough
New York City
Jonathan Jon Stewart
Jonathan Stuart Leibowitz
Jonathan Stewart
Interesting
Funny
Running
Something
Hierarchy
Always
Bizarre
Hot
Fun
Break

More quotes by Jon Stewart

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Comedy is the only form of entertainment where the audience doesn't know what to expect. In an evening, you might get ten comics doing ten different things. That's not what happens when you go to hear music. There isn't a classical performance followed by a hoedown followed by rap.
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The best defence against bullshit is vigilance. So if you smell something, say something.
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It really does seem that the Democrat's problem isn't that they're calling for timetables - it's that they're calling them 'timetables'. You're up against Bush and the Republicans - you've got to bring some zing. Don't call them timetables - call them 'Patriot Dates', 'Freedom Deadlines'... 'Glory Goals'.
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To have not shot his friend in the face would have sent a message to the quail that America is weak.
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I still do not understand how a corporation can have person-hood if it has no soul and never dies.
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If the guy in front of you at the polls has arm swords, you might want to considering filling out an absentee ballot.
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The government is just you know, blowing the doors off the media. And not everywhere, and I think, this is where you know, a lot of those blog reporters and all of those things are bringing a lot of urgency and a lot of momentum to stories that wouldn't normally carry any momentum.
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If you smell something, say something.
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For me it was just exciting to see fake news catching on like that. We don't you know, it's interesting. I think we don't make things up. We just distill it to, hopefully, its most humorous nugget. And in that sense it seems faked and skewed just because we don't have to be subjective or pretend to be objective. We can just put it out there.
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I have not moved out of the comedian's box into the news box. The news box is moving towards me.
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In 1982 I was playing soccer at William and Mary, and a kid from Randolph-Macon called me a kike. I ran after him. 'I'm not a... well, yes I am.
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Religion is far more of a choice than homosexuality.
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Donald Rumsfeld. Love him or hate him, you've gotta admit: a lot of people hate him.
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President Bush's approval ratings have taken somewhat of a dive. A senior slump, if you will. Leading President Bush to one conclusion: He is the only one who realizes what a great job he's being doing.
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There are a hell of a lot of jobs that are scarier than live comedy. Like standing in the operating room when a guy's heart stops, and you're the one who has to fix it!
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The next four years, though, you still have to abide by the oversight process that is there to prevent this kind of bizarre sort of cult-like atmosphere that falls along. I mean, I accept that kind of veil of secrecy around Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, but I don't accept that around our government.
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The Internet is just a world passing around notes in a classroom. That's all it is. All those media companies say, We're going to make a killing here. You won't because it's still only as good as the content.
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I like not to be good at anything, so I keep hopping around.
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You're on CNN. The show that leads into me is puppets making crank phone calls. What is wrong with you?
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In what is perhaps the strangest turn in the President's efforts to rally support, he agreed that Iraq is just like Vietnam, but in a good way.
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