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As an adolescent, Vonnegut made my life bearable.

Jon Stewart

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Jon Stewart
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: November 28
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Manhattan borough
New York City
Jonathan Jon Stewart
Jonathan Stuart Leibowitz
Jonathan Stewart
Vonnegut
Adolescent
Bearable
Made
Life

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Is listening to Pink Floyd in the dark a medical condition?
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I don't trust any country that looks around a continent and says, Hey, I'll take the frozen part.
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So, is there hope for a truly democratic Africa? Long answer: Only if continent-wide improvements in education, human rights and public health are coupled with an aggressive and far-sighted debt-relief program that breaks the cycle of subsistence farming and urban squalor. Short answer: No.
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Nobody out-rednecks the great state of America.
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It's not really a good sign when your audience applauds Satan.
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The nation of Dubai banned the movie Charlie's Angles because it's offensive to the religion of Islam. Apparently, the religion of Islam is offended by anything without a plot.
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Don't you dare besmirch the name of Congress. They are patriotic Americans trying to dress and feed themselves.
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California is choosing between the lesser of, uh, 300 evils.
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If we are going to amend the constitution, shouldn't it be to keep the omos-hay from arrying-may?
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They always throw around this term 'the liberal elite.' And I kept thinking to myself about the Christian right. What's more elite than believing that only you will go to heaven?
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Wow, the entire network of anchors has been hired to be the press secretary.
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Child: Why on this night do we eat Hot Fudge Sundaes? Adult: To remind us that being Jewish is like having your birthday every day!! Plus they're delicious!
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Do you know how many movies I wrote when I was high?
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The real challenge is when I'm at work, I'm at work. I'm locked in, I'm ready to go, I'm focused. When I'm at home, I'm locked in and I'm ready to go and I'm focused on home. We don't watch the show. We don't watch the news. We don't do any of that stuff. I sit down, I play Barbies. And sometimes the kids will come home and play with me.
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Planet Hollywood has shrunk from seventy-five locations around the world to just over thirty-five over the past two years. No new Planet Hollywoods are opening, which in turn has caused a 100 percent decline in opportunities for Bruce Willis to play the harmonica.
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Nazi Germany was so destructive to Judaism not only for the loss of life, but because many who survived began to see the practice of Judaism as somewhat of a health hazard.
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The Internet is just a world passing around notes in a classroom.
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If your regime is not strong enough to handle a joke, then you don't have a regime.
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Everything in Italian sounds like 'Give me your money or I'm going to beat your @$$'.
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As long as I don't end up hosting a skin care commercial with Cher, I'm happy.
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