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I'm not just a boy toy. I have feelings and dreams like anybody else.

Jon Stewart

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Jon Stewart
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: November 28
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Journalist
Satirist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Manhattan borough
New York City
Jonathan Jon Stewart
Jonathan Stuart Leibowitz
Jonathan Stewart
Feelings
Else
Dream
Like
Toys
Anybody
Dreams
Boys

More quotes by Jon Stewart

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People don't understand that we're not warriors in their cause. We're a group of people that really feel that they want to write jokes about the absurdity that we see in government and the world and all that, and that's it.
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One of the things that I do think government counts on is that people are busy. And it's very difficult to mobilize a busy and relatively affluent country, unless it's over really crucial- you know, foundational issues.
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Ah, the first rule of public speaking -- always start with a joke.
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Parenthood is an amazing opportunity to be able to ruin someone from scratch.
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Technology. It's like science, only useless.
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What you do for Jewish New Year is you go down to Times Square. It's a lot quieter than the regular New Year. It's just a few Jews walking around going, sup?
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If the events of September 11, 2001, have proven anything, it's that the terrorists can attack us, but they can't take away what makes us American - our freedom, our liberty, our civil rights. No, only Attorney General John Ashcroft can do that.
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I mean, I'm not hoping for the apes and the monolith. I'm hoping for controlled chaos to assist us.
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I don't consider myself a serious and social political critic.
Jon Stewart
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War that hasn't affected us here, in the way that you would imagine a five-year war would affect a country.
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Like everyone else, I want to sleep with Leonardo DiCaprio.
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If it turns out that President Barack Obama can make a deal with the most intransigent, hard-line, unreasonable, totalitarian mullahs in the world but not with Republicans? Maybe he's not the problem.
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I don't trust any country that looks around a continent and says, Hey, I'll take the frozen part.
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Yesterday, the president met with a group he calls the coalition of the willing. Or, as the rest of the world calls them, Britain and Spain.
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Sitting around with funny people, banging out jokes and creating a television show. I have no hobbies, no outside interests. I'm fine with spending 14 hours a day putting a show together with tape and string.
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I think people are used to people in show business having a lot of hubris. I think I have a normal amount of self-loathing but because I'm in show business it's considered self-deprecation. In normal life I would just be considered your average neurotic.
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You cannot judge a book by its contents.
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Honestly, folks, I think my brain is broken.
Jon Stewart
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The beautiful thing about faking a news show is the topicality is delayed.
Jon Stewart
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Everything in Italian sounds like 'Give me your money or I'm going to beat your @$$'.
Jon Stewart