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I hear that whenever someone in the White House tells a lie, Nixon gets a royalty.

Johnny Carson

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Johnny Carson
Age: 79 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 23
Died: 2005
Died: January 23
Actor
Host
Journalist
Magician
Military Officer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Presenter
Writer
Corning
Iowa
John William Carson
Carson
The Great Carsoni
Lying
White
Nixon
House
Royalty
Someone
Tells
Whenever
Gets
Hear

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When a comic becomes enamored with his own views and foists them off on the public in a polemic way, he loses not only his sense of humor but his value as a humorist.
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I'm an entertainer I try to give the public what it wants while I'm on the screen, and I'm completely sincere about it. If I don't happen to be a laughing boy off the screen, that doesn't make me a hypocrite or a phony.
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When the public starts classifying you as thoughtful, someone given to serious issues, you find yourself declassified as a humorist.
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If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.
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I don't think it's you that changes with success - it's the people around you who change. Because of your new status, they change in relation to you.
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There's a big difference between being a loner and being lonely. I'm far from lonely. My day is full of things I enjoy, starting with my show. Any time my work is going well and I have a relationship with a woman that's pretty solid, that does it for me.
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Democracy means free television, not good television, but free.
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My success just evolved from working hard at the business at hand each day.
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If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.
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I am one of the lucky people in the world I found something I always wanted to do, and I have enjoyed every single minute of it.
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