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Do you know my dream? I really want to become an aluminum-siding salesman.
Johnny Carson
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Johnny Carson
Age: 79 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 23
Died: 2005
Died: January 23
Actor
Host
Journalist
Magician
Military Officer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Presenter
Writer
Corning
Iowa
John William Carson
Carson
The Great Carsoni
Aluminum
Salesman
Dream
Become
Really
Siding
More quotes by Johnny Carson
Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical health, you will have had more success than you could possibly have imagined.
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My success just evolved from working hard at the business at hand each day.
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Democracy means free television, not good television, but free.
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I demand my right to a private life, just as I respect that right for everybody else.
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He's so fat, he can be his own running mate.
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There's only one critic whose opinion I really value, in the final analysis: Johnny Carson. I have never needed any entourage standing around bolstering my ego. I'm secure. I know exactly who and what I am. I don't need to be told. I make no apologies for being the way I am.
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I don't think it's you that changes with success - it's the people around you who change. Because of your new status, they change in relation to you.
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The only thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about money.
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Democracy is buying a big house you can't afford with money you don't have to impress people you wish were dead.
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How much of the national news that you report to the public each night consists of information you've actually gone out and dug up on your own?
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The Champagne they have stored is getting more valuable every year.
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Happiness is being served with a paternity suit on your 75th birthday.
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Whatever you do, you're going to be criticized.
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An oxymoron? What's that? A moron who studies at Oxford?
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Entertainment is like any other major industry it's cold, big business. The business end wants to know one thing: Can you do the job? If you can, you're in, you're made if you can't, you're out.
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In 1932, lame duck president Herbert Hoover was so desperate to remain in the White House that he dressed up as Eleanor Roosevelt. When FDR discovered the hoax in 1936, the two men decided to stay together for the sake of the children.
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I'm an entertainer, not a commentator. If you're a comedian your job is to make people laugh.
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Happiness is discovering the prune juice your doctor ordered you to drink has fermented.
Johnny Carson
Pittsburgh is kind of like Newark without the cultural advantages.
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May you have the income of a Republican and the sex life of a Democrat!
Johnny Carson
