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I demand my right to a private life, just as I respect that right for everybody else.

Johnny Carson

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Johnny Carson
Age: 79 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 23
Died: 2005
Died: January 23
Actor
Host
Journalist
Magician
Military Officer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Presenter
Writer
Corning
Iowa
John William Carson
Carson
The Great Carsoni
Life
Private
Demand
Respect
Everybody
Else
Right

More quotes by Johnny Carson

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People are hypocrites. If you ask them what they want to see on TV, they'll tell you they want better quality programming. And then what do they watch? 'Gilligan's Island.'
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Only lie about the future.
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Democracy is welcoming people from other lands, and giving them something to hold onto. Usually a mop or a leaf blower.
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There's only one critic whose opinion I really value, in the final analysis: Johnny Carson. I have never needed any entourage standing around bolstering my ego. I'm secure. I know exactly who and what I am. I don't need to be told. I make no apologies for being the way I am.
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May you have the income of a Republican and the sex life of a Democrat!
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When a comic becomes enamored with his own views and foists them off on the public in a polemic way, he loses not only his sense of humor but his value as a humorist.
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Never use a big word when a little filthy one will do.
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Believe me, you don't walk away from the kind of money you make with a daily television show. You might get awful tired of it sometimes, but take a second look at the check and you get less tired right away.
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I would like to say, for the record, that I am in favor of using more American Indians and other minorities in motion pictures, I am against polluting the oceans of the world, I am for every nationality having its own homeland, I am against whacking baby seals on the head, and I am for saving the whales.
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I get sick of that old rationalization, We're staying together because of the children. Kids couldn't be more miserable living with parents who can't stand each other. They're far better off if there's an honest, clean divorce.
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Happiness is seeing your son drafted the same day he's been accepted to an expensive college.
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The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other.
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An oxymoron? What's that? A moron who studies at Oxford?
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If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.
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I know a guy who gave up smoking cigarettes, consuming, sex, and wealthy meals.
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Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.
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For days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow, but phone calls taper off.
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I wouldn't have the slightest interest in running for public office. I'd rather make jokes about politicians than become one of them.
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I hear that whenever someone in the White House tells a lie, Nixon gets a royalty.
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Entertainment is like any other major industry it's cold, big business. The business end wants to know one thing: Can you do the job? If you can, you're in, you're made if you can't, you're out.
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