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I owe one thing to my public - the best performance I can give.

Johnny Carson

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Johnny Carson
Age: 79 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 23
Died: 2005
Died: January 23
Actor
Host
Journalist
Magician
Military Officer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Presenter
Writer
Corning
Iowa
John William Carson
Carson
The Great Carsoni
Give
Best
Giving
Thing
Performance
Performances
Public

More quotes by Johnny Carson

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Happiness is a tiger in your tank and a pussycat in your back seat.
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Thanksgiving is an emotional holiday. People travel thousands of miles to be with people they only see once a year. And then discover once a year is way too often.
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There are very few Japanese Jews. As a result, there is no Japanese word for Alan King.
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When the public starts classifying you as thoughtful, someone given to serious issues, you find yourself declassified as a humorist.
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I think students ought to have the right to protest, but not to the point of anarchy.
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Happiness is seeing the muscular lifeguard all the girls were admiring leave the beach hand in hand with another muscular lifeguard.
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Democracy means free television, not good television, but free.
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Believe me, you don't walk away from the kind of money you make with a daily television show. You might get awful tired of it sometimes, but take a second look at the check and you get less tired right away.
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Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.
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I hear that whenever someone in the White House tells a lie, Nixon gets a royalty.
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Despite the fact that computer speeds are measured in nanoseconds and picoseconds - one billionth and one trillionth of a second, respectively - the smallest interval of time known to man is that which occurs in Manhattan between the traffic signal turning green and the taxi driver behind you blowing his horn.
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Happiness is seeing your son drafted the same day he's been accepted to an expensive college.
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The Champagne they have stored is getting more valuable every year.
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What's all this fuss about plutonium? How can something named after a Disney character be dangerous?
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I loved the towns I grew up in as a boy, and after I became a celebrity, I went back several times. I would have had the time of my life seeing the old places and the old faces again, but the attitude of those same people was, I guess you're so big we bore you now.
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In 1932, lame duck president Herbert Hoover was so desperate to remain in the White House that he dressed up as Eleanor Roosevelt. When FDR discovered the hoax in 1936, the two men decided to stay together for the sake of the children.
Johnny Carson
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Pittsburgh is kind of like Newark without the cultural advantages.
Johnny Carson
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May you have the income of a Republican and the sex life of a Democrat!
Johnny Carson
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I get sick of that old rationalization, We're staying together because of the children. Kids couldn't be more miserable living with parents who can't stand each other. They're far better off if there's an honest, clean divorce.
Johnny Carson
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He's so fat, he can be his own running mate.
Johnny Carson