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I owe one thing to my public - the best performance I can give.

Johnny Carson

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Johnny Carson
Age: 79 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 23
Died: 2005
Died: January 23
Actor
Host
Journalist
Magician
Military Officer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Presenter
Writer
Corning
Iowa
John William Carson
Carson
The Great Carsoni
Performance
Performances
Public
Give
Best
Giving
Thing

More quotes by Johnny Carson

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Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place.
Johnny Carson
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When the public starts classifying you as thoughtful, someone given to serious issues, you find yourself declassified as a humorist.
Johnny Carson
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A two-pound turkey and a fifty-pound cranberry-that's Thanksgiving dinner at Three Mile Island.
Johnny Carson
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Democracy means free television, not good television, but free.
Johnny Carson
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People are hypocrites. If you ask them what they want to see on TV, they'll tell you they want better quality programming. And then what do they watch? 'Gilligan's Island.'
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May you have the income of a Republican and the sex life of a Democrat!
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Happiness is sitting down to watch some slides of your neighbor's vacation and finding out that he spent two weeks in a nudist colony.
Johnny Carson
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Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.
Johnny Carson
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Some sad news from Australia... the inventor of the boomerang grenade died today.
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Happiness is seeing the muscular lifeguard all the girls were admiring leave the beach hand in hand with another muscular lifeguard.
Johnny Carson
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I think it's almost immoral to keep on with a marriage that's really bad. It just gets more and more rotten and vindictive and everybody gets more and more hurt. There's not enough honesty about marriage, I think. I wish more people would face the truth about their marital situations.
Johnny Carson
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What's all this fuss about plutonium? How can something named after a Disney character be dangerous?
Johnny Carson
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As you all know by now, this is the 51st annual Academy Awards. Two hours of sparkling entertainment spread out over a four-hour show.
Johnny Carson
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People will pay more to be entertained than educated.
Johnny Carson
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Only lie about the future.
Johnny Carson
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Despite the fact that computer speeds are measured in nanoseconds and picoseconds - one billionth and one trillionth of a second, respectively - the smallest interval of time known to man is that which occurs in Manhattan between the traffic signal turning green and the taxi driver behind you blowing his horn.
Johnny Carson
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I demand my right to a private life, just as I respect that right for everybody else.
Johnny Carson
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I hated my last boss. He asked, Why are you two hours late? I said, I fell downstairs. He said, That doesn't take two hours.
Johnny Carson
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Never marry a girl named 'Marie' who used to be known as 'Murray'.
Johnny Carson
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I am one of the lucky people in the world I found something I always wanted to do, and I have enjoyed every single minute of it.
Johnny Carson