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Pie throwing is kind of a lost art, and although it may be a rather rudimentary, burlesque humor, there's something inherently funny about taking a pie in the face, under the right conditions.
Johnny Carson
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Johnny Carson
Age: 79 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 23
Died: 2005
Died: January 23
Actor
Host
Journalist
Magician
Military Officer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Presenter
Writer
Corning
Iowa
John William Carson
Carson
The Great Carsoni
Faces
Pie
Funny
Throwing
Lost
Although
Art
Taking
May
Conditions
Right
Humor
Rudimentary
Kind
Face
Burlesque
Something
Rather
Inherently
More quotes by Johnny Carson
The Hollywood tradition I like best is called sucking up to the stars.
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Despite the fact that computer speeds are measured in nanoseconds and picoseconds - one billionth and one trillionth of a second, respectively - the smallest interval of time known to man is that which occurs in Manhattan between the traffic signal turning green and the taxi driver behind you blowing his horn.
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We resort, frankly, to pies, which is a comedy staple that's gone back, I guess, to since the first pie was ever baked.
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Happiness is being served with a paternity suit on your 75th birthday.
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The vast majority of us don't want to face the fact that we're in the middle of a sweeping social revolution. In sex. In spiritual values. In opposition to wars no one wants. In opposition to government big-brotherhood. In civil rights. In basic human goals. They're all facets of a general upheaval.
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Democracy is welcoming people from other lands, and giving them something to hold onto. Usually a mop or a leaf blower.
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The closest thing to Roseanne Barr's singing the national anthem was my cat being neutered.
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If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.
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If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.
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Happiness is sitting down to watch some slides of your neighbor's vacation and finding out that he spent two weeks in a nudist colony.
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I know a guy who gave up smoking cigarettes, consuming, sex, and wealthy meals.
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If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have inner peace.
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If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.
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Some sad news from Australia... the inventor of the boomerang grenade died today.
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Pittsburgh is kind of like Newark without the cultural advantages.
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In 1932, lame duck president Herbert Hoover was so desperate to remain in the White House that he dressed up as Eleanor Roosevelt. When FDR discovered the hoax in 1936, the two men decided to stay together for the sake of the children.
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I would like to say, for the record, that I am in favor of using more American Indians and other minorities in motion pictures, I am against polluting the oceans of the world, I am for every nationality having its own homeland, I am against whacking baby seals on the head, and I am for saving the whales.
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What's all this fuss about plutonium? How can something named after a Disney character be dangerous?
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My success just evolved from working hard at the business at hand each day.
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