Quote

Adults ask questions as a child does. When you stop wondering, you might as well put your rocker on the front porch and call it a day.

Johnny Carson

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Johnny Carson
Age: 79 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 23
Died: 2005
Died: January 23
Actor
Host
Journalist
Magician
Military Officer
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Presenter
Writer
Corning
Iowa
John William Carson
Carson
The Great Carsoni
Wells
Fronts
Might
Front
Well
Stop
Rocker
Children
Wonder
Rockers
Asks
Porch
Child
Wondering
Call
Adults
Doe
Questions

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Never use a big word when a little filthy one will do.
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People will pay more to be entertained than educated.
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Entertainment is like any other major industry it's cold, big business. The business end wants to know one thing: Can you do the job? If you can, you're in, you're made if you can't, you're out.
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Believe me, you don't walk away from the kind of money you make with a daily television show. You might get awful tired of it sometimes, but take a second look at the check and you get less tired right away.
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For days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow, but phone calls taper off.
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Money gives me just one big thing that's really important, and that's the freedom of not having to worry about money.
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Never ask your wife if she still hears from her old pimp.
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I get sick of that old rationalization, We're staying together because of the children. Kids couldn't be more miserable living with parents who can't stand each other. They're far better off if there's an honest, clean divorce.
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Happiness is being served with a paternity suit on your 75th birthday.
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The vast majority of us don't want to face the fact that we're in the middle of a sweeping social revolution. In sex. In spiritual values. In opposition to wars no one wants. In opposition to government big-brotherhood. In civil rights. In basic human goals. They're all facets of a general upheaval.
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I have an ego like anybody else, but I don't need to be stoked by going before the public all the time.
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The closest thing to Roseanne Barr's singing the national anthem was my cat being neutered.
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People are hypocrites. If you ask them what they want to see on TV, they'll tell you they want better quality programming. And then what do they watch? 'Gilligan's Island.'
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How much of the national news that you report to the public each night consists of information you've actually gone out and dug up on your own?
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Do you know my dream? I really want to become an aluminum-siding salesman.
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George Burns has been on my show twenty or thirty times, or maybe more. How can you turn down a guy that age?
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What's all this fuss about plutonium? How can something named after a Disney character be dangerous?
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I feel the one sensible thing you can do is try to live in a way that pleases you. If you don't hurt anybody else, what you do is your own business.
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I'm an entertainer, not a commentator. If you're a comedian your job is to make people laugh.
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There's only one critic whose opinion I really value, in the final analysis: Johnny Carson. I have never needed any entourage standing around bolstering my ego. I'm secure. I know exactly who and what I am. I don't need to be told. I make no apologies for being the way I am.
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