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Ever feel like killing somebody just to see if you could get away with it? Sure, you have. Everybody has little things that get on their nerves.

John Waters

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John Waters
Age: 78
Born: 1946
Born: April 22
Actor
Art Collector
Cinematographer
Director
Drawer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Editor
Film Producer
Filmmaker
Installation Artist
Baltimore
Maryland
John Samuel Waters
John Samuel
Jr. Waters
the Pope of Trash
Pope of Trash
the Duke of Dirty
Duke of Dirty
Littles
Ever
Little
Nerves
Feel
Killing
Feels
Somebody
Things
Everybody
Like
Sure
Away

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Anyone from my past I'm interested in, I've already stalked their homes. I like to go outside.
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I haven't committed all the crimes in my movies, I would have gotten the death penalty many years ago if I had.
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It`s great to be able to drive around and spy on people, which I do when I'm writing. People tell me the most personal things about their lives for no reason - on airplanes, everywhere I go. People just blurt out secrets. I'm not sure why. I think that they see in my films that nothing will make me uptight. I'm not going to judge them.
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I never got along in school really - I already knew what I wanted to do. I have never in my life got a paycheck from anywhere in the world that asked if I went to school.
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People vomitied at my movies not because of the movie but because they were drunk. I took credit anyway.
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Stop blaming your parents. If you're really angry at 60 years old, you're an idiot! You've got to work some of it out.
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The only way I've learned to change anyone's mind politically is to make them laugh. My whole career has been about that.
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There is right and there is wrong, I have NEVER been wrong.
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Technique is nothing more than failed style.
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Fifty years seems like a good anniversary. Even after I'm dead, how much better could I get than this? I mean, it's great, I'm not dead, so I get to see it.
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Insider can be more ludicrous. How did I ever end up [as one]? Carsick [Waters's book on hitchhiking] was on the New York Times best-seller list for five weeks. [One of the characters was] a singing asshole that does a duet with Connie Francis! Times have changed. That's mainstream, in a weird way.
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You have to remember that it is impossible to commit a crime while reading a book.
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I'll have pot in my home for guests - I'm polite! - but I don't sit around and smoke by myself, ever. Not like I did when I was young.
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The anger I have about high school - which I do have because they discouraged every interest I ever had actually I call it anti-education - that anger led to my career.
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Many hundred-million-dollar Hollywood comedies aren't any good. They're trying to shock you.
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Aren't maids the ultimate art critics?
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Valentine's Day is my mother's birthday. If I'm wildly in love, I've sent people chicken hearts, which seems to appeal to the kind of person that I've been in love with.
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I've signed dicks, asses, parole cards, a colostomy bag while it was still pumping. A couple of years ago, I signed a bloody Tampax. That's one you don't forget. I'm not asking for someone to top that!
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The only time I had a normal boyfriend was during the time of AIDS, so maybe that saved me. It's certainly not karma.
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It isn't enough to shock. It's easy to shock. Real surprise is what I'm after.
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