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I can't tell the difference between the best and the worst 'cause I realize not everybody wants to have sex in the middle of a demolition derby race in the car.

John Waters

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John Waters
Age: 78
Born: 1946
Born: April 22
Actor
Art Collector
Cinematographer
Director
Drawer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Editor
Film Producer
Filmmaker
Installation Artist
Baltimore
Maryland
John Samuel Waters
John Samuel
Jr. Waters
the Pope of Trash
Pope of Trash
the Duke of Dirty
Duke of Dirty
Causes
Difference
Everybody
Realize
Race
Cause
Tell
Wants
Best
Realizing
Demolition
Differences
Derby
Worst
Car
Middle
Sex

More quotes by John Waters

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I never had any desire to get a tattoo. If I was ever going to get one, I would get a plain anchor with a rope around it, the most unimaginative possible tattoo, like Popeye had.
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I built my [early] career on negative reviews. There was a cultural war going on, the '60s was going on. All the film critics were square. They hated my movies. You could never have that happen today. Critics are way too hip.
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You go to school to figure out who you want to be and how you can do it, and [maybe] I should have, because the films would probably be technically better.
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Contemporary art hates you.
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I make independent movies. I don't know how to do anything else. I don't know any other job that I could really get.
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Humor is how you change people's opinions, and if you can make someone laugh, they'll listen, even if they hate you.
John Waters
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No comedy should be longer than 90 minutes. There's no such thing as a good long joke.
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The further away I am from water, the less well I do!
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When they throw the water on the witch, she says, “Who would have thought a good little girl like you could destroy my beautiful wickedness”. That line inspired my life. I sometimes say it to myself before I go to sleep, like a prayer.
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I always say you need something weird on your face and some good shoes and nobody looks in the middle.
John Waters
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I actually think that my films are intellectual. I think almost everything I do is intellectual, but I would never say that, because that's a compliment. That's up to others to say about me. The same way, I would never say I do art. I think art is up to history. It's up to other people to utter that word. So I try to be humble.
John Waters
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You see a kid making a film on a cell phone. He doesn't know what he's doing either. But it comes out kind of good.
John Waters
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If you're a parent, I tell you how to get through Christmas. I think that if you've ever had a bad feeling about Christmas coming, I'll tell you how to deal with it. So, I think in a way it's like going to a sane psychiatrist that actually gives you some good advice, I hope!
John Waters
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My films can be considered political action against the tyranny of good taste.
John Waters
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Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday because I don't have to do anything except bring wine and go to my sister's all day and go to the movies with the family. So, actually, Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday, but there's not much comedy material on Thanksgiving. Melatonin really isn't that funny.
John Waters
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You have to remember that it is impossible to commit a crime while reading a book.
John Waters
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I've had it with being nice, understanding, fair and hopeful. I feel like being negative all day. The chip on my shoulder could sink the QE2. I've got an attitude problem and nobody better get in my way...I'm in a bad mood and the whole stupid little world is gonna pay!
John Waters
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The only time I had a normal boyfriend was during the time of AIDS, so maybe that saved me. It's certainly not karma.
John Waters
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Catholics have more extreme sex lives because they're taught that pleasure is bad for you. Who thinks it's normal to kneel down to a naked man who's nailed to a cross? It's like a bad leather bar.
John Waters
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People always ask me what I'm doing on the subway, but I love it! Sometimes I like to ride in the front car and look out the window at the rats.
John Waters