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True success is figuring out your life and career so you never have to be around jerks.

John Waters

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John Waters
Age: 78
Born: 1946
Born: April 22
Actor
Art Collector
Cinematographer
Director
Drawer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Editor
Film Producer
Filmmaker
Installation Artist
Baltimore
Maryland
John Samuel Waters
John Samuel
Jr. Waters
the Pope of Trash
Pope of Trash
the Duke of Dirty
Duke of Dirty
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True
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Never
Jerks
Life
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Jerk

More quotes by John Waters

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Well cult is a word you would never say in Hollywood. In any film business, if you're trying to get your next film made, you would never say, Oh, my last film was a cult film. I'd say, Oh great, well I hope this one isn't!
John Waters
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Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday because I don't have to do anything except bring wine and go to my sister's all day and go to the movies with the family. So, actually, Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday, but there's not much comedy material on Thanksgiving. Melatonin really isn't that funny.
John Waters
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It reinforced everything that I believe. I am an optimist. I believe in the goodness of people.
John Waters
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I think Chelsea Girls is a complete masterpiece and I think Andy's [Warhol] films are equally as good as the art. I think one day they will be considered equal. They aren't yet. They will be.
John Waters
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I think it's all independent films. There aren't any! If they were looking for me when I was making Polyester, then it'd be perfect, but they're not. I'm not looking for that. TV is much bigger and better now far more people see it.
John Waters
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Insider can be more ludicrous. How did I ever end up [as one]? Carsick [Waters's book on hitchhiking] was on the New York Times best-seller list for five weeks. [One of the characters was] a singing asshole that does a duet with Connie Francis! Times have changed. That's mainstream, in a weird way.
John Waters
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If you're a parent, I tell you how to get through Christmas. I think that if you've ever had a bad feeling about Christmas coming, I'll tell you how to deal with it. So, I think in a way it's like going to a sane psychiatrist that actually gives you some good advice, I hope!
John Waters
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There are little things that get on my nerves, like people who have reading material in their powder room. When you go in someone’s house, and next to the toilet they have a huge basket of magazines, I find that repellent. I recommend against straining while reading.
John Waters
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I'll have pot in my home for guests - I'm polite! - but I don't sit around and smoke by myself, ever. Not like I did when I was young.
John Waters
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I probably would have made [films] anywhere. Every city has something they're ashamed of. I would have made films about it and turned it into something positive.
John Waters
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My idea of rich is that you can buy every book you ever want without looking at the price and you're never around assholes. That's the two things to really fight for in life.
John Waters
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I've bought the same used car from the same man since I was 16 - a Buick every time. They always work, I don't care what color it is. I don't want people to recognize my car in case I want to commit a crime.
John Waters
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The further away I am from water, the less well I do!
John Waters
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Everyone wants to be called an outsider so I'm a proud insider. If I was young I'd be in my parents' house shutting down the government on my computer. The new delinquent is the hacker.
John Waters
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Terrible things always seemed to happen to hitchhikers in movies - including my own. It has always been glamorous and dangerous and scary and sexy.
John Waters
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A psychiatrist once told me early in treatment, Stop trying to make me like you, and what a sobering and welcome smack in the face that statement was. Yet somehow, every day of my life is still a campaign for popularity, or better yet, a crowded funeral.
John Waters
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The anger I have about high school - which I do have because they discouraged every interest I ever had actually I call it anti-education - that anger led to my career.
John Waters
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Stop blaming your parents. If you're really angry at 60 years old, you're an idiot! You've got to work some of it out.
John Waters
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Valentine's Day is my mother's birthday. If I'm wildly in love, I've sent people chicken hearts, which seems to appeal to the kind of person that I've been in love with.
John Waters
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If you purposefully look to shock people, it isn't funny. That's what 50 million dollar Hollywood comedies do try to be shocking and dirty.
John Waters