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People, I guess, generally come to see me do stand-up with a working knowledge of my broad sense of humor on The Daily Show ... I don't think anyone would mistake me as an actual anchor.

John Oliver

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John Oliver
Age: 47
Born: 1977
Born: April 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
John William Oliver
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Stand
Anchors
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More quotes by John Oliver

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Welcome to The Daily Show, I'm John Oliver. Jon Stewart is still not here. He is currently living out a live-action Lord of the Rings role-playing experience deep in the New Zealand wilderness.
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I'm British. I don't really have access to my emotions on a daily basis.
John Oliver
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Iran is the middle child of the Axis of Evil. Iraq is the oldest child and gets the lion's share of the attention, and North Korea is the crazy baby.
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My family are from Liverpool, so I have some twang there - I have a Midlands accent, and I was raised about an hour north of London, so my voice is a mess. Although, to American ears, it sounds like the crisp language of a queen's butler.
John Oliver
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In improv, the whole thing is that it is a relationship between the two people, as a back and forth. In standup, you don't really want to be listening to what somebody is saying you want to project your jokes into their face.
John Oliver
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You're sonically racist, Americans. You think we all sound the same, whereas I have definitely a mongrel accent.
John Oliver
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My family is from Liverpool, so I have some of those vowel sounds, I've got the slack tone of someone from Birmingham, and then I was raised in Bedford, which is just north of London. So my accent, if it's possible, makes even less sense to a Brit than to an American.
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I knew I was going to go into the field and make fun of people to their faces. I knew what I was getting into.
John Oliver
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It's a great time to be doing political satire when the world is on a knife edge.
John Oliver
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When I heard that Hitler had problems with flatulence, it's funny. What - does that make him a funny man? No. It means he had funny moments when his rear end was speaking louder than his mouth.
John Oliver
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I'm British, so obviously I repress any powerful emotions of any kind in relation to anything.
John Oliver
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Being a Mets fan is like lending someone a lot of money and you just know that you'll never get paid back.
John Oliver
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Having a human conversation is not something I've had any training in either as a comedian or as, you know, a human being.
John Oliver
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Politics has become infused with narcissism in America.
John Oliver
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I think puns are not just the lowest form of wit, but the lowest form of human behavior.
John Oliver
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I don't think I'm identified as the anchorman, I think I'm identified as the impostor anchorman - there's a very clear line there ... I don't think it changes the way they respond.
John Oliver
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Veterans' issues are quite close to my heart. I find it quite hard to talk about, actually.
John Oliver
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When you're doing stand-up, you want to stand onstage and, to the extent that you can, uncomplicatedly entertain.
John Oliver
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Congratulations, Congress! 77% disapproval rating! You may be about to become the English language's most offensive C-word.
John Oliver
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I think Americans still can't help but respond to the natural authority of this voice. Deep down they long to be told what to do by a British accent. That's why so many infomercials have British people.
John Oliver