Quote

Florida, just because you're shaped like some combination of a gun and a d*ck doesn't mean you have to act that way.

John Oliver

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John Oliver
Age: 47
Born: 1977
Born: April 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
John William Oliver
Combination
Gun
Doesn
Mean
Way
Like
Florida
Shaped

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It's pretty physically unsettling, living life on a visa.
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You're sonically racist, Americans. You think we all sound the same, whereas I have definitely a mongrel accent.
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Stand-up comedy seems like a terrifying thing. Objectively. Before anyone has done it, it seems like one of the most frightening things you could conceive, and there's just no shortcut - you just have to do it.
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The moment I accept that there's an artistic, redeeming quality in puns, I have a horrible feeling I'll get hooked.
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I'm always interested in audience interaction. Not so much aggressive audience interaction - I'm genuinely interested in how people see things.
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If you vote for Democrats, you might as well give Al Quaeda a death ray and a manual.
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Campaign ads are the backbone of American democracy if American democracy suffered a gigantic spinal injury.
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Anybody who claims to be excited for April Fools' Day is probably a sociopath.
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I do not want to leave in [U.S.] ... I cannot make that clear enough to immigration authorities who may be listening to this interview. I don't want to leave, so please don't make me.
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Politics has become infused with narcissism in America.
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There are two kinds of hecklers: the destructive and constructive hecklers.
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A Southern accent is not a club in my bag.
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Wow. Losing 95 percent of your audience in just five years. That basically makes Obama the NBC of presidents.
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I feel more at home knowing I'm not really at home. It takes all the pressure off you trying to fit in!
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I know I'd be an absolutely horrendous politician.
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