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There are so many low points with stand-up. You are perpetually humiliated, so it doesn't really matter anymore. I don't have any dignity left to lose. An audience can’t hurt you anymore when you’ve been completely dismantled.
John Oliver
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John Oliver
Age: 47
Born: 1977
Born: April 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
John William Oliver
Many
Lose
Dismantled
Really
Loses
Perpetually
Stand
Humiliated
Hurt
Points
Audience
Lows
Left
Anymore
Doesn
Dignity
Matter
Completely
More quotes by John Oliver
In improv, the whole thing is that it is a relationship between the two people, as a back and forth. In standup, you don't really want to be listening to what somebody is saying you want to project your jokes into their face.
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One thing that America is objectively exceptional at is overreacting whenever anyone accuses them of not being exceptional.
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You just try to be true to your idea of what is funny and what is also interesting.
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If you’re asking me, would I have voted for Mitt Romney, the answer is absolutely not. Emphatically not. I cannot envision a world in which I would have voted for Mitt Romney unless I sustained a massive concussion.
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Everybody should care about facts. That is something all of us should agree on.
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You're sonically racist, Americans. You think we all sound the same, whereas I have definitely a mongrel accent.
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I think being an outsider in general always helps you in comedy. I think it helps to have an outsider's eye. And so I have an outsider's voice. You know, as soon as I start talking, I don't belong here. And I think that helps in a way.
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Sometimes it's good to remember how bad food can be, so you can enjoy the concept of flavour to the fullest.
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Teenagers falling off skateboards - funny. Nut shots - funny. Breaking wind - funny. The world cannot change those. Those three things are columns upon which humor is built.
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Florida, just because you're shaped like some combination of a gun and a d*ck doesn't mean you have to act that way.
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I'm not really much of an actor, so when I started on 'The Daily Show', I was just trying to adopt the faux authority of a newsperson.
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The poverty line is like the age of consent: if you find yourself parsing exactly where it is, you’ve probably already done something very, very wrong.
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Australia turns out to be a sensational place, albeit one of the most comfortably racist places I've ever been in. They've really settled into their intolerance like an old resentful slipper.
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Being a Mets fan is like lending someone a lot of money and you just know that you'll never get paid back.
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Democracy is like a tambourine, not everyone can be trusted with it.
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I feel non-stop Brit shame!
John Oliver
I did sketch comedy, but I never did improv. So I've just tried to learn as I go.
John Oliver
It's pretty physically unsettling, living life on a visa.
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Stand-up comedy seems like a terrifying thing. Objectively. Before anyone has done it, it seems like one of the most frightening things you could conceive, and there's just no shortcut - you just have to do it.
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Southern people are bigger-hearted and kinder than I had any right to expect.
John Oliver
