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I would hate to meet myself at 15.

John Oliver

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John Oliver
Age: 47
Born: 1977
Born: April 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
John William Oliver
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Meet
Hate

More quotes by John Oliver

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I know I'd be an absolutely horrendous politician.
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Politics has become infused with narcissism in America.
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You just try to be true to your idea of what is funny and what is also interesting.
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If you vote for Democrats, you might as well give Al Quaeda a death ray and a manual.
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You're sonically racist, Americans. You think we all sound the same, whereas I have definitely a mongrel accent.
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Politicians don't really bring up religion in England.
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When you're doing stand-up, you want to stand onstage and, to the extent that you can, uncomplicatedly entertain.
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When I heard that Hitler had problems with flatulence, it's funny. What - does that make him a funny man? No. It means he had funny moments when his rear end was speaking louder than his mouth.
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Campaign ads are the backbone of American democracy if American democracy suffered a gigantic spinal injury.
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Stand-up comedy seems like a terrifying thing. Objectively. Before anyone has done it, it seems like one of the most frightening things you could conceive, and there's just no shortcut - you just have to do it.
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I get nostalgic for British negativity. There is an inherent hope and positive drive to New Yorkers. When you go back to Britain, everybody is just running everything down. It's like whatever the opposite of a hug is.
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I can't relax. I find vacations problematic.
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You can write jokes at any point of the day. Jokes are not that hard to write, or they shouldn't be when it is literally your job.
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Teenagers falling off skateboards - funny. Nut shots - funny. Breaking wind - funny. The world cannot change those. Those three things are columns upon which humor is built.
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People in Britain see Richard Quest as a kind of an offensive cartoon character.
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I'm not really much of an actor, so when I started on 'The Daily Show', I was just trying to adopt the faux authority of a newsperson.
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I think being an outsider in general always helps you in comedy. I think it helps to have an outsider's eye. And so I have an outsider's voice. You know, as soon as I start talking, I don't belong here. And I think that helps in a way.
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The moment I accept that there's an artistic, redeeming quality in puns, I have a horrible feeling I'll get hooked.
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Everybody should care about facts. That is something all of us should agree on.
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I have exactly as much rhythm as you think I have.
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