Quote

I would hate to meet myself at 15.

John Oliver

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

John Oliver
Age: 47
Born: 1977
Born: April 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
John William Oliver
Meet
Hate
Would

More quotes by John Oliver

Image
It really helps a comedian to be an outsider.
John Oliver
Image
I don't think I'm identified as the anchorman, I think I'm identified as the impostor anchorman - there's a very clear line there ... I don't think it changes the way they respond.
John Oliver
Image
It's exciting to have a role in anything that's Claymation, just because you're always intrigued by what a clay wizard version of yourself would be.
John Oliver
Image
Florida, just because you're shaped like some combination of a gun and a d*ck doesn't mean you have to act that way.
John Oliver
Image
Believe it or not the war on Iraq is based on a sound scientific principle, The bee hive principle. Which clearly states that if you are stung by a bee, you should follow it back to its nest and then proceed to beat nest to a pulp with a baseball bat until the stripey little turd has learned its lesson.
John Oliver
Image
My family are from Liverpool, so I have some twang there - I have a Midlands accent, and I was raised about an hour north of London, so my voice is a mess. Although, to American ears, it sounds like the crisp language of a queen's butler.
John Oliver
Image
You're sonically racist, Americans. You think we all sound the same, whereas I have definitely a mongrel accent.
John Oliver
Image
I know I'd be an absolutely horrendous politician.
John Oliver
Image
I care about facts the way I care about oxygen and imbibing enough water a day to live.
John Oliver
Image
When you're doing stand-up, you want to stand onstage and, to the extent that you can, uncomplicatedly entertain.
John Oliver
Image
One thing that America is objectively exceptional at is overreacting whenever anyone accuses them of not being exceptional.
John Oliver
Image
I think it might honestly be time for the Sunshine State to officially change its motto to the Worst State.
John Oliver
Image
Americans just don't understand dry wit.
John Oliver
Image
Southern people are bigger-hearted and kinder than I had any right to expect.
John Oliver
Image
If your name is Sepp, at the bare minimum you’ve strangled someone in a bar fight.
John Oliver
Image
Politics has become infused with narcissism in America.
John Oliver
Image
Everybody should care about facts. That is something all of us should agree on.
John Oliver
Image
I watch one news channel until my soul can't take it anymore. It's the background of my life.
John Oliver
Image
Armando Iannucci is one of my heroes. As I was growing up, he was probably the most influential comic voice that I had.
John Oliver
Image
The moment I accept that there's an artistic, redeeming quality in puns, I have a horrible feeling I'll get hooked.
John Oliver