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Stand-up comedy seems like a terrifying thing. Objectively. Before anyone has done it, it seems like one of the most frightening things you could conceive, and there's just no shortcut - you just have to do it.
John Oliver
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John Oliver
Age: 47
Born: 1977
Born: April 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
John William Oliver
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Frightening
Comedy
Stand
Anyone
Shortcut
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Objectively
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More quotes by John Oliver
Australia turns out to be a sensational place, albeit one of the most comfortably racist places I've ever been in. They've really settled into their intolerance like an old resentful slipper.
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Politics has become infused with narcissism in America.
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I'm British, so obviously I repress any powerful emotions of any kind in relation to anything.
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You can write jokes at any point of the day. Jokes are not that hard to write, or they shouldn't be when it is literally your job.
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When you're dealing with serious subjects, there is a pressure to be absolutely sure that you know what you're doing.
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Everybody should care about facts. That is something all of us should agree on.
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I know I'd be an absolutely horrendous politician.
John Oliver
Net neutrality: The only two words that promise more boredom in the English language are 'featuring Sting,'
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Teenagers falling off skateboards - funny. Nut shots - funny. Breaking wind - funny. The world cannot change those. Those three things are columns upon which humor is built.
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I think I'm just a summer fling that people will soon forget.
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Florida, just because you're shaped like some combination of a gun and a d*ck doesn't mean you have to act that way.
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Believe it or not the war on Iraq is based on a sound scientific principle, The bee hive principle. Which clearly states that if you are stung by a bee, you should follow it back to its nest and then proceed to beat nest to a pulp with a baseball bat until the stripey little turd has learned its lesson.
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People are friendlier in New York than London.
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I feel non-stop Brit shame!
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I'm not really much of an actor, so when I started on 'The Daily Show', I was just trying to adopt the faux authority of a newsperson.
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Drug companies are a bit like high school boyfriends - they're much more concerned with getting inside you than being effective once they're in there.
John Oliver
I've made so many people angry that they kind of blur into one unpleasant memory of people staring at you with somewhere between passive aggression and active aggression.
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Iran is the middle child of the Axis of Evil. Iraq is the oldest child and gets the lion's share of the attention, and North Korea is the crazy baby.
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I don't think I'm identified as the anchorman, I think I'm identified as the impostor anchorman - there's a very clear line there ... I don't think it changes the way they respond.
John Oliver
People in Britain see Richard Quest as a kind of an offensive cartoon character.
John Oliver
