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If your name is Sepp, at the bare minimum you’ve strangled someone in a bar fight.
John Oliver
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John Oliver
Age: 47
Born: 1977
Born: April 23
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Journalist
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Writer
John William Oliver
Bare
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Someone
Strangled
More quotes by John Oliver
Democracy is like a tambourine, not everyone can be trusted with it.
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I think being an outsider in general always helps you in comedy. I think it helps to have an outsider's eye. And so I have an outsider's voice. You know, as soon as I start talking, I don't belong here. And I think that helps in a way.
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I'm British, so obviously I repress any powerful emotions of any kind in relation to anything.
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I watch one news channel until my soul can't take it anymore. It's the background of my life.
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It's pretty physically unsettling, living life on a visa.
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When you're dealing with serious subjects, there is a pressure to be absolutely sure that you know what you're doing.
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Once you learn how to make people laugh, then you get to choose exactly how you want to make them laugh.
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If you vote for Democrats, you might as well give Al Quaeda a death ray and a manual.
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People in Britain see Richard Quest as a kind of an offensive cartoon character.
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I'm always interested in audience interaction. Not so much aggressive audience interaction - I'm genuinely interested in how people see things.
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I care about facts the way I care about oxygen and imbibing enough water a day to live.
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Here in America, people come out to see what they've known you to do. In England it's like everyone comes out to tell you exactly how well they think you're doing.
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The disconnect between America and its military is shocking.
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I get nostalgic for British negativity. There is an inherent hope and positive drive to New Yorkers. When you go back to Britain, everybody is just running everything down. It's like whatever the opposite of a hug is.
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In improv, the whole thing is that it is a relationship between the two people, as a back and forth. In standup, you don't really want to be listening to what somebody is saying you want to project your jokes into their face.
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There are so many low points with stand-up. You are perpetually humiliated, so it doesn't really matter anymore. I don't have any dignity left to lose. An audience can’t hurt you anymore when you’ve been completely dismantled.
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Politics has become infused with narcissism in America.
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Campaign ads are the backbone of American democracy if American democracy suffered a gigantic spinal injury.
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Believe it or not the war on Iraq is based on a sound scientific principle, The bee hive principle. Which clearly states that if you are stung by a bee, you should follow it back to its nest and then proceed to beat nest to a pulp with a baseball bat until the stripey little turd has learned its lesson.
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I don't think I'm identified as the anchorman, I think I'm identified as the impostor anchorman - there's a very clear line there ... I don't think it changes the way they respond.
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